Im going to pretend that you made this up
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"Simping" |OT| or Where Dating and Depression Meet
- Thread starter DY_nasty
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Im going to pretend that you made this up
ViewtifulJC
Banned
Har pls
tell me this chick was like Mya or something
tell me this chick was like Mya or something
Naw.
She was an extremely short Cambodian chick, mediocre ass, so-so rack and a decent face. Maybe a 7 on a scale to 10. I mean, if it wasn't for the fact that she was a psycho, I wouldn't mind hitting it. I'd post a picture, but that's kind of fucked up.
Definitely not worth the shit he's going through though. Not even close Lol.
Her sister on the other hand is a 9-9.5 out of 10, fucking fine as fuck. It's weird, they look a lot like each other, but her sister's like a more well-rounded/refined version of her. Like she's the after shot when the magazine got done photoshopping the shit out of the psycho chick. And she's down with chocolate, cause her boyfriend looked like Wesley Snipes from Demolition Man. Same hair and everything.
She was an extremely short Cambodian chick, mediocre ass, so-so rack and a decent face. Maybe a 7 on a scale to 10. I mean, if it wasn't for the fact that she was a psycho, I wouldn't mind hitting it. I'd post a picture, but that's kind of fucked up.
Definitely not worth the shit he's going through though. Not even close Lol.
Her sister on the other hand is a 9-9.5 out of 10, fucking fine as fuck. It's weird, they look a lot like each other, but her sister's like a more well-rounded/refined version of her. Like she's the after shot when the magazine got done photoshopping the shit out of the psycho chick. And she's down with chocolate, cause her boyfriend looked like Wesley Snipes from Demolition Man. Same hair and everything.
cool_dude_2049
Banned
Fuck, man. This Thread!
I've simped a time or two, as I'm sure most people have. I don't have an awesome story to go with it, but I can sympathize with why people do it.
If you had such a low self esteem and someone was giving you enough attention to brighten your day, is it really worth your integrity for a some slight recognition? A lot of people say yes, but I can't do that to myself.
I'm in the middle of a confidence slump myself and I'm in the middle of a weight loss transition like you, harSon. Congrats, btw.
Shit, I knew a guy that gave this girl, $200 and a PS3 (not at the same time) because he liked her and they went out once, maybe. She made it clear that she didn't like him, but that didn't stop him from giving her the complete Star Wars collection on BluRay because she's never seen it.
Maybe they think that when shit hits the fan in the girl's life, they'll come crawling back to the man that's been there all along.
I've simped a time or two, as I'm sure most people have. I don't have an awesome story to go with it, but I can sympathize with why people do it.
If you had such a low self esteem and someone was giving you enough attention to brighten your day, is it really worth your integrity for a some slight recognition? A lot of people say yes, but I can't do that to myself.
I'm in the middle of a confidence slump myself and I'm in the middle of a weight loss transition like you, harSon. Congrats, btw.
Shit, I knew a guy that gave this girl, $200 and a PS3 (not at the same time) because he liked her and they went out once, maybe. She made it clear that she didn't like him, but that didn't stop him from giving her the complete Star Wars collection on BluRay because she's never seen it.
Maybe they think that when shit hits the fan in the girl's life, they'll come crawling back to the man that's been there all along.
Have a friend in a similar situation and for the most part you can't do shit about it. My friend's girl beats him, doesn't allow him to hang out with me and our friends, she has no job and spends all his money, she has tried hooking up with a couple of us when he would go to the bathroom.His parents have even confronted him about the abuse and have asked us for help but so far nothing we tell him has got through.
On Topic: I vaguely recall doing something like this in high school when I was a dumb kid and a female friend didn't return my affections. I grew up, though, and never really did it again. This is also not a phenomenon I've witnessed among any of my friends.
Less On Topic: What happens when this intersects with ladder theory, friend zones, alpha/beta/omega theory, nice guys, "nice guys," and pickup artistry? Is there a buzzword event horizon?
Less On Topic: What happens when this intersects with ladder theory, friend zones, alpha/beta/omega theory, nice guys, "nice guys," and pickup artistry? Is there a buzzword event horizon?
Aaron Strife
Banned
I totally simped on this girl, luckily I scored in the end. Seven months of a decent relationship followed by four months of passive-aggressively putting her daddy issues on me, but that's another topic.
PS3GamerKyle
Member
sweet jesus the terms being coined these days
xXBetter Off DadXx
Member
Goddamn.
I'm very certain a recent situation puts me firmly in the "simping" category.
Basically, this girl is one of the sisters of my good friends ex-girlfriend. I meet her a few years ago, she seems cool, don't really think too much more of it.
Not too much later she friend requests me on Facebook, says we should hang out. Sure, why not, she seems cool. So we hang out very sporadically, maybe two to three times in a year. That pattern applies to over the past two years.
Fast forward to this year, and we hang out back in April, have a seemingly good time. After this we keep in contact a little more than usual, and I find myself starting to dig on her more than I have before. I generally don't take the straightforward approach, but for some reason this time I say fuck it, and contact her letting her know that I'm interested. She says she wishes she would have known sooner, just started dating someone, etc. No problem I say, and since we had already planned on getting together earlier in the week we meet up.
We don't really discuss what I had told her earlier in the week, but we proceed to have the best time I can ever remember us having, she is much more flirtatious than in the past this time, but I keep telling myself, remember, she is seeing someone, attempting to remind myself so as not to get too excited about how things seem to be going.
Fast forward through June and July, we hang out a lot, like 3-5 times a week. Here's where the simping really kicks in, during the course of this, I find out that the place I've been dropping her off at when we're done hanging out is her boyfriends house. Wah wah. But I tell myself, hey, just be cool with being her friend, she seems to enjoy spending time with you, and you enjoy spending time with her, so why stop?
That continues through June, but at the end of June, I realize that me trying to be just friends with someone that I'm attracted is not a good call. I tell her this, and also add that she shouldn't contact me, as all that's likely to do is further confuse me, as when I had asked for her perspective on us spending all of this time together, she gave an answer which consisted of saying that she likes spending time with me, feels like she can be herself around me, etc., but avoids specifically saying whether or not she's interested in me as more than a friend.
She is good about not contacting me for oh, five days. She texts me and just asks how I'm doing. We casually text back and forth briefly. About a week later she asks me if I want to hang out, I say yeah sure as my reasoning for it is that she's been telling me that things in general in her life are chaotic, and wants to get together to talk about it. I convince myself I can try to be a just a friend again and before I know it I'm dropping her off at her boyfriends less than before, but still with regularity.
I get sick of this faster this time, and I'm having another conversation with her about how this situation cannot work for me, she again gives me no solid information verbally on whether or not she is interested in me as more than a friend.
We don't talk to each other for a couple of weeks.
She contacts me and wants to see how I'm doing. I ask her how things have been and she tells me about a new job, etc.
Two weeks go by and we are casually texting back and forth, and I'm cool with this at that point. After two weeks has passed, she asks if I want to hang since we haven't gotten together in awhile. I say sure and we get together for the first time in awhile. When we meet up I find out that she is no longer seeing the guy she was seeing before. The evening is brief and we have a good time for the first part, then, as she was prone to doing fairly often before, she is seemingly very suddenly having a not so great time, and wants to call it a night.
Another two weeks go by and we casually(but less than usual) text back and forth. After two weeks passes, she asks if I want to hang out again, and I say yeah, but this time my intention is to ask her why it is that we hang out, since the last time we got together I had went over how things seem to go when we do get together, and it became clear to me that she rarely ever asked me anything about myself, with this last time being particularly potent in pointing that out as she literally did not ask me a single question about how I've been/what I've been doing.
So we get together, I ask her what I want to ask her. First I ask her about her general behavior(the aforementioned seemingly having a good time/ then switching over to almost immediately not having a good time, wanting to call it a night that she has done repeatedly over time), to which she laughs and replies that a lot of people ask her why shes does that, and she tells me she honestly doesn't know. Then I ask her why she wants to hang out with me when she seemingly has not interest in me as a person. She replies that she doesn't know what to ask me about......ok.
We hang out for a bit after this and have a decent time until suddenly....she wants to go home. I take her home.
That was around a month ago, and since then our only contact has consisted of me texting her, getting very short replies, and then the conversation dying off.
Her birthday is in two weeks and I'm planning on writing her a letter, and drawing her a picture. I've convinced myself that I'm only doing this to be nice to a person that from all indications(knowledge gained firsthand as well as from my good friend who used to date her sister) has had a really rough life. I intend to make the latter purely about the positive aspects of her that I do like and attracted me to her in the first place, but I'm battling back and forth with myself because I know there's a part of me that holds out some hope that this gesture may lead, someday, to the possibility of something still occurring between us beyond friendship.
I'm very certain a recent situation puts me firmly in the "simping" category.
Basically, this girl is one of the sisters of my good friends ex-girlfriend. I meet her a few years ago, she seems cool, don't really think too much more of it.
Not too much later she friend requests me on Facebook, says we should hang out. Sure, why not, she seems cool. So we hang out very sporadically, maybe two to three times in a year. That pattern applies to over the past two years.
Fast forward to this year, and we hang out back in April, have a seemingly good time. After this we keep in contact a little more than usual, and I find myself starting to dig on her more than I have before. I generally don't take the straightforward approach, but for some reason this time I say fuck it, and contact her letting her know that I'm interested. She says she wishes she would have known sooner, just started dating someone, etc. No problem I say, and since we had already planned on getting together earlier in the week we meet up.
We don't really discuss what I had told her earlier in the week, but we proceed to have the best time I can ever remember us having, she is much more flirtatious than in the past this time, but I keep telling myself, remember, she is seeing someone, attempting to remind myself so as not to get too excited about how things seem to be going.
Fast forward through June and July, we hang out a lot, like 3-5 times a week. Here's where the simping really kicks in, during the course of this, I find out that the place I've been dropping her off at when we're done hanging out is her boyfriends house. Wah wah. But I tell myself, hey, just be cool with being her friend, she seems to enjoy spending time with you, and you enjoy spending time with her, so why stop?
That continues through June, but at the end of June, I realize that me trying to be just friends with someone that I'm attracted is not a good call. I tell her this, and also add that she shouldn't contact me, as all that's likely to do is further confuse me, as when I had asked for her perspective on us spending all of this time together, she gave an answer which consisted of saying that she likes spending time with me, feels like she can be herself around me, etc., but avoids specifically saying whether or not she's interested in me as more than a friend.
She is good about not contacting me for oh, five days. She texts me and just asks how I'm doing. We casually text back and forth briefly. About a week later she asks me if I want to hang out, I say yeah sure as my reasoning for it is that she's been telling me that things in general in her life are chaotic, and wants to get together to talk about it. I convince myself I can try to be a just a friend again and before I know it I'm dropping her off at her boyfriends less than before, but still with regularity.
I get sick of this faster this time, and I'm having another conversation with her about how this situation cannot work for me, she again gives me no solid information verbally on whether or not she is interested in me as more than a friend.
We don't talk to each other for a couple of weeks.
She contacts me and wants to see how I'm doing. I ask her how things have been and she tells me about a new job, etc.
Two weeks go by and we are casually texting back and forth, and I'm cool with this at that point. After two weeks has passed, she asks if I want to hang since we haven't gotten together in awhile. I say sure and we get together for the first time in awhile. When we meet up I find out that she is no longer seeing the guy she was seeing before. The evening is brief and we have a good time for the first part, then, as she was prone to doing fairly often before, she is seemingly very suddenly having a not so great time, and wants to call it a night.
Another two weeks go by and we casually(but less than usual) text back and forth. After two weeks passes, she asks if I want to hang out again, and I say yeah, but this time my intention is to ask her why it is that we hang out, since the last time we got together I had went over how things seem to go when we do get together, and it became clear to me that she rarely ever asked me anything about myself, with this last time being particularly potent in pointing that out as she literally did not ask me a single question about how I've been/what I've been doing.
So we get together, I ask her what I want to ask her. First I ask her about her general behavior(the aforementioned seemingly having a good time/ then switching over to almost immediately not having a good time, wanting to call it a night that she has done repeatedly over time), to which she laughs and replies that a lot of people ask her why shes does that, and she tells me she honestly doesn't know. Then I ask her why she wants to hang out with me when she seemingly has not interest in me as a person. She replies that she doesn't know what to ask me about......ok.
We hang out for a bit after this and have a decent time until suddenly....she wants to go home. I take her home.
That was around a month ago, and since then our only contact has consisted of me texting her, getting very short replies, and then the conversation dying off.
Her birthday is in two weeks and I'm planning on writing her a letter, and drawing her a picture. I've convinced myself that I'm only doing this to be nice to a person that from all indications(knowledge gained firsthand as well as from my good friend who used to date her sister) has had a really rough life. I intend to make the latter purely about the positive aspects of her that I do like and attracted me to her in the first place, but I'm battling back and forth with myself because I know there's a part of me that holds out some hope that this gesture may lead, someday, to the possibility of something still occurring between us beyond friendship.
xXBetter Off DadXx
Member
A part of me knows this, and accepts it. There's another part of me that is usually not as strong, but at times seems to dominate and convince me that there's still that possibility.
Thanks for the words though, I need that objective perspective badly.
Take your right hand and slap yourself. Delete her number. You're being played bro- you're doing all the boyfriends responsibilities w/o any return.
xXBetter Off DadXx
Member
Yeah I know. I think writing all of that out, along with both of you that have posted so far has inspired me, and I'm deleting her number, our texts, her on facebook, all of it.
God that feels good.(to say that)
Thanks guys.
Edit: Actually did ever last one of those listed above......feels even better.
Edit2: And to everyone who has posted in this thread, with a good or a bad story, reading every last shred of insight helped me do what I was having a really hard time doing on my own, so yeah, thanks to everyone who posted in here.
Dreams-Visions
Member
ordering these bitches for those in need.
In.every.fucking.girl.thread.
cool_dude_2049
Banned
Steve, the hard part is only beginning. You just got to stick to your guns and stay away from this girl. She's using you as an emotional crutch and doesn't care enough to ask about your life. I know you'd like to brighten her b'day with something nice but you don't owe this girl a damn thing. Cut your losses and get her away from even the back of your mind.
Remember that a few of us on this forum are telling you to ditch her the next time she pops into your head.
Remember that a few of us on this forum are telling you to ditch her the next time she pops into your head.
Good lord. The rabbit part... I can't imagine how messed up her brain is. Not only does she do it but she tells people she just met about it. Amazing.
I guess I could say this about any of the shit she did.
But it's never worse. Avoiding it is worse. Is that a sign of a good person? It's debatable.
Already been down that road a hundred times before...
airmangataosenai
Member
This thread might've saved my life. I'm beyond a doormat with this one girl, going through our chat conversations since I first met her (We work together) in 2010 is sort of disgusting. The way I listened to her endlessly talk about boyfriend after boyfriend.... Loaning money....
All the meanwhile I meticulously avoided any harsh criticism of her even when I knew she was wrong. I think/thought of her as a friend but looking back I dunno how she's viewed me anymore. Our relationship was pretty unbalanced, I can't really even remember many times where she was even particularly nice to me let alone went out of her way for me.
I took the first step and deleted her from Facebook, I dunno if I'll have the resolve to cut all ties given the fact that I still have to see her all of the time (And I don't know if it's fair to blame her for what amounts to my own stupidity, I have no proof that she knew what I was thinking for sure).
All the meanwhile I meticulously avoided any harsh criticism of her even when I knew she was wrong. I think/thought of her as a friend but looking back I dunno how she's viewed me anymore. Our relationship was pretty unbalanced, I can't really even remember many times where she was even particularly nice to me let alone went out of her way for me.
I took the first step and deleted her from Facebook, I dunno if I'll have the resolve to cut all ties given the fact that I still have to see her all of the time (And I don't know if it's fair to blame her for what amounts to my own stupidity, I have no proof that she knew what I was thinking for sure).
You don't think it's fair that she share some of the blame? You're both at fault, but she knew damn well what she was doing. Anyone who manipulates and has you simping - they have crimes to answer for, it's just the punishment is what they gave you: nothing. Will they even care anyway? They've proven they don't. It never adds up.
And for me it was having a friend who showed me what a good relationship can be like, albeit on an entirely platonic level. It's never a competition for adoration with the worthwhile ones. You give, they give back, genuinely - golden rule more or less.
ryutaro's mama
Member
xXBetter Off DadXx
Member
I'm going to do this, thanks.
IrishNinja
Member
see consequence taught me a simp was a pimp with sympathy, learn something new everyday
ryutaro's mama
Member
Parallax
best seen in the classic "Shadow of the Beast"
IrishNinja
Member
it so is, but it's the best one ever
this is the inverse of that, but the panel also accepts oran "juice", you know which track
Good thread.
I oddly enough don't simp because I don't even have the shred of self-esteem needed to attempt to woo some chick.
This sounds like me, except for the bolded part. Haven't gotten there yet.
Where do I learn that?
I oddly enough don't simp because I don't even have the shred of self-esteem needed to attempt to woo some chick.
This sounds like me, except for the bolded part. Haven't gotten there yet.
Where do I learn that?
way more
Member
I'm disgusted that the mental illness of depression would be co-opted by whiny pussy fucks too mini-dicked to tell a girl how they feel.
The "Depression" thread on GAF already has this problem. Does it really need to go further?
Do people with diabetes have to deal with dumb fucks pretending they have the disease?
The "Depression" thread on GAF already has this problem. Does it really need to go further?
Do people with diabetes have to deal with dumb fucks pretending they have the disease?
radioheadrule83
Banned
theignoramus
Member
I dont have this problem of fear and a lack of self respect when dealing with girls I like, but Ive been played like a fool by someone only interested in their unresolved IR sex fantasy. once she got that, it was on to the next one.
there's nothing worse than texting a girl you think you had chemistry with, then realizing they probably fucking someone else already, laughing at your hopeful ass. feels bad mang.
there's nothing worse than texting a girl you think you had chemistry with, then realizing they probably fucking someone else already, laughing at your hopeful ass. feels bad mang.
Snkfanatic
Banned
Steve just walk away man. Might be tough but just walk away from it.
A Gaffer once told me how: if you are not sitting on your bed trying to slit your wrists it's not "real clinical" depression.
Should have contacted a mod. Grrrrrrrr.
Not all depression is the same. Yes, extreme cases are indeed extreme cases, and nowhere do I, or anyone else, imply that there are extreme case here (at least not yet... but going by some of the posts in dating-age over the years, there have no doubt been such cases in the past) - but smaller bouts of depression need to be recognized regardless. I think many people would agree that one of the biggest issues is that they don't realize when they're affected by it. Severity doesn't matter as much as general awareness in this instance.
HappyBivouac
Member
I'll share my story. It's a long one but maybe it'll be interesting to write it.
Dated a girl for almost four years, early 2007 to late 2010. This story isn't about her. While we were together, she briefly met a girl and later commented that this girl seemed to have the same taste as me in everything. Cute, short girl, kind of boyish appearance in a pretty way and boyish personality. Girlfriend ends up introducing me to this girl, and the girl and I, without girlfriend, go to a Mogwai concert together. I fall for her almost instantly but resolve to make nothing of the feelings as I'm genuinely happy in my relationship. Keep up a good friendship, but naively make my feelings known. I'm too quick to open up. We continue to talk into the wee hours regularly and hang out every now and then. It's obvious we have a natural bond. Girlfriend is jealous but hides it. At the time I'm still confident I won't do anything with this girl, anyway.
Fast forward a bit. Friendship has waned a bit due to girlfriend's jealousy being obvious. I'm being intentionally cold and distant for a while. Girlfriend moves far away for grad school. Friendship with girl rekindles. Visit girlfriend regularly, try to keep up long-distance relationship. Call girlfriend one night, she doesn't answer. Figure she's in the shower or whatever, call again later. She does the whole pick up and immediately hang up thing (it's a land-line phone) except when she hangs up, the button isn't actually pressed so the phone is still on the line, unbeknownst to girlfriend. I overhear things with girlfriend and other guy. It is literally the most painful experience in my memory to this day. Break up with her that night. In my emotional state, I say a bunch of shitty things to her which I've come to regret having said. Break off all contact.
Proceed to become really close with the friend, though just through facebook chat and skype and such as she's abroad for a semester. Count the days for her to return to the states. Upon her return, we hang out all the time. She's completely aware of my feelings. Late nights sitting around in her apartment, or in her car watching the snowflakes listening to music. Shit like that. We become increasingly close but I get the impression that she is guarded romantically, while at moments opening up and showing affection. "It's not easy for me to have feelings for someone. I almost never do." Have a small party at my place one night. We both end up getting mildly drunk and cuddling and sleeping together. Sleeping. Nothing sexual. Too confused about her back-and-forth affections and her words and a bunch of other shit to even try anything. Fucking idiot.
I end up getting a summer job teaching in China, where the girl is from. She gets an internship there too. We fly together, I live with her family for a week. Kind of sweet. In that culture it means something to visit a girl's family, or so I tell myself. I run into the ex-boyfriend who cheated on her, too. He has this cold, smug bastard look on his face the whole time, probably keeping his distance from her and wondering who the hell I am. She probably still has feelings for him. Kind of want to kill the bastard. After the week of living with her family is over, I move to another city for my job. I successfully keep my thoughts off her for a while. Have a bunch of dumb little summer flings because why the hell not. Visit her in shanghai once during the summer. Treat her as if I want nothing more than friendship. Find out she's crazy about some dude at her internship, but he has a girlfriend. Meh.
We both come back to the states for school at the end of summer. We meet up. Her attitude towards me seems.. different. She's sweet and affectionate. She talks about my summer flings (which I barely mentioned to her, and when I did it was with utmost ambiguity) with obvious jealous undertones. She even suggests that after all that happened in the summer we should be together, then quickly catches herself and says, "but we're best friends." I shrug it off and try to be cool. Occasional brief flashes of affection throughout the semester, but we're apart most of the time. End up becoming really close friends with her roommate out of nowhere, she gets jealous of that for whatever fucking reason, we kinda don't talk much for a while.
Fast forward to middle of next semester, or spring semester 2012. Friendship slightly rekindled, and she, myself and her roommate hang out at her place and have a few drinks together for an evening. She talks about a painting project she's planning, saying she couldn't get any of her friends to model nude for it so she'd be modelling nude herself. Says it with a tone of voice obviously looking for a reaction from me. I suggest I could be the model. She seems to like the idea, but then somehow it ends up she wants us both naked in the painting. Her roommate is well aware of the unstated drama revolving around this situation and is enjoying it as the one who gets to take the photos of us to be painted from. Anyway, that happens. Roommate leaves to meet with her boyfriend shortly afterward. We end up kissing somehow. Then she insists I leave. Finally I do. I call her the following weekend to hang out. She blows up on the phone, with, "why would I hang out with you?" Don't hear from her for at least two months.
Her family comes from China for her graduation. They want to see me. I see her for the first time in forever as I have dinner with her family. She and I go out for drinks afterwards. She's weirdly flirty and latching onto me for some reason. We see each other briefly once more, then, summer, and she's gone. New York. Grad school. We talk a bunch over texts and stuff. Sometimes blatantly flirty, sometimes distant. She seems to be happy that I plan to visit for a Sigur Ros concert. That falls through though. I don't get to visit her. The affection sort of dies off and I begin to feel cool with the fact that it may be time to move on. With the coming of the new semester I meet some random girl at school and have some dumb fling with her for a month before that blows up. Contact with girl in New York infrequent. When we do have contact, she's guarded, unhappy. I go about life as usual. Don't text or call her much. Call her one day to chat. No answer. I comment on some random facebook status about her schoolwork being stressful. She explodes. "Can you just stop fking calling me?" Then blocks me on facebook, cuts off every form of contact. Her friends are going, "wtf?" and she explains to them that I'm clearly some kind of stalker.
Haven't talked to her since. Haven't wanted to.
Dated a girl for almost four years, early 2007 to late 2010. This story isn't about her. While we were together, she briefly met a girl and later commented that this girl seemed to have the same taste as me in everything. Cute, short girl, kind of boyish appearance in a pretty way and boyish personality. Girlfriend ends up introducing me to this girl, and the girl and I, without girlfriend, go to a Mogwai concert together. I fall for her almost instantly but resolve to make nothing of the feelings as I'm genuinely happy in my relationship. Keep up a good friendship, but naively make my feelings known. I'm too quick to open up. We continue to talk into the wee hours regularly and hang out every now and then. It's obvious we have a natural bond. Girlfriend is jealous but hides it. At the time I'm still confident I won't do anything with this girl, anyway.
Fast forward a bit. Friendship has waned a bit due to girlfriend's jealousy being obvious. I'm being intentionally cold and distant for a while. Girlfriend moves far away for grad school. Friendship with girl rekindles. Visit girlfriend regularly, try to keep up long-distance relationship. Call girlfriend one night, she doesn't answer. Figure she's in the shower or whatever, call again later. She does the whole pick up and immediately hang up thing (it's a land-line phone) except when she hangs up, the button isn't actually pressed so the phone is still on the line, unbeknownst to girlfriend. I overhear things with girlfriend and other guy. It is literally the most painful experience in my memory to this day. Break up with her that night. In my emotional state, I say a bunch of shitty things to her which I've come to regret having said. Break off all contact.
Proceed to become really close with the friend, though just through facebook chat and skype and such as she's abroad for a semester. Count the days for her to return to the states. Upon her return, we hang out all the time. She's completely aware of my feelings. Late nights sitting around in her apartment, or in her car watching the snowflakes listening to music. Shit like that. We become increasingly close but I get the impression that she is guarded romantically, while at moments opening up and showing affection. "It's not easy for me to have feelings for someone. I almost never do." Have a small party at my place one night. We both end up getting mildly drunk and cuddling and sleeping together. Sleeping. Nothing sexual. Too confused about her back-and-forth affections and her words and a bunch of other shit to even try anything. Fucking idiot.
I end up getting a summer job teaching in China, where the girl is from. She gets an internship there too. We fly together, I live with her family for a week. Kind of sweet. In that culture it means something to visit a girl's family, or so I tell myself. I run into the ex-boyfriend who cheated on her, too. He has this cold, smug bastard look on his face the whole time, probably keeping his distance from her and wondering who the hell I am. She probably still has feelings for him. Kind of want to kill the bastard. After the week of living with her family is over, I move to another city for my job. I successfully keep my thoughts off her for a while. Have a bunch of dumb little summer flings because why the hell not. Visit her in shanghai once during the summer. Treat her as if I want nothing more than friendship. Find out she's crazy about some dude at her internship, but he has a girlfriend. Meh.
We both come back to the states for school at the end of summer. We meet up. Her attitude towards me seems.. different. She's sweet and affectionate. She talks about my summer flings (which I barely mentioned to her, and when I did it was with utmost ambiguity) with obvious jealous undertones. She even suggests that after all that happened in the summer we should be together, then quickly catches herself and says, "but we're best friends." I shrug it off and try to be cool. Occasional brief flashes of affection throughout the semester, but we're apart most of the time. End up becoming really close friends with her roommate out of nowhere, she gets jealous of that for whatever fucking reason, we kinda don't talk much for a while.
Fast forward to middle of next semester, or spring semester 2012. Friendship slightly rekindled, and she, myself and her roommate hang out at her place and have a few drinks together for an evening. She talks about a painting project she's planning, saying she couldn't get any of her friends to model nude for it so she'd be modelling nude herself. Says it with a tone of voice obviously looking for a reaction from me. I suggest I could be the model. She seems to like the idea, but then somehow it ends up she wants us both naked in the painting. Her roommate is well aware of the unstated drama revolving around this situation and is enjoying it as the one who gets to take the photos of us to be painted from. Anyway, that happens. Roommate leaves to meet with her boyfriend shortly afterward. We end up kissing somehow. Then she insists I leave. Finally I do. I call her the following weekend to hang out. She blows up on the phone, with, "why would I hang out with you?" Don't hear from her for at least two months.
Her family comes from China for her graduation. They want to see me. I see her for the first time in forever as I have dinner with her family. She and I go out for drinks afterwards. She's weirdly flirty and latching onto me for some reason. We see each other briefly once more, then, summer, and she's gone. New York. Grad school. We talk a bunch over texts and stuff. Sometimes blatantly flirty, sometimes distant. She seems to be happy that I plan to visit for a Sigur Ros concert. That falls through though. I don't get to visit her. The affection sort of dies off and I begin to feel cool with the fact that it may be time to move on. With the coming of the new semester I meet some random girl at school and have some dumb fling with her for a month before that blows up. Contact with girl in New York infrequent. When we do have contact, she's guarded, unhappy. I go about life as usual. Don't text or call her much. Call her one day to chat. No answer. I comment on some random facebook status about her schoolwork being stressful. She explodes. "Can you just stop fking calling me?" Then blocks me on facebook, cuts off every form of contact. Her friends are going, "wtf?" and she explains to them that I'm clearly some kind of stalker.
Haven't talked to her since. Haven't wanted to.
Rocket Scientist
Member
Sounds good man!
Ice cold.
Omegasquash
Member
I hope that the 180 stories here serve to empower those gents that haven't yet had the realization (moment of clarity, if you will) to know that they're capable of better than what they're currently doing.
There are some real turnarounds here, and they show that consistent work will really make results happen. Kudos to all that have achieved more.
There are some real turnarounds here, and they show that consistent work will really make results happen. Kudos to all that have achieved more.
I haven't really done this consciously since about the first or second quarter of freshman year of college. At that point I realized that you couldn't make a girl like you by doing things for her. I'm not sure why I thought that would work in the first place.
However, I just realized that I've unintentionally simped a few times since then. One example that comes to mind is when I bought two concert tickets (on ebay, so I wasn't out that much money) for a certain artist that I liked and that I knew this one girl also liked. Then I made up some story about how my friend that I planned to go with had to work, and now I had an extra ticket, and did she want it.
She was resistant to the idea of taking it for free, and I wondered about that at first, but I realize now that I was totally trying to set up a stealth date with her, and she was trying to block that.
This was about four years ago.
I did this from around the end of my freshman year until around my junior year, after I realized what I had been doing earlier. I definitely swung too hard in the opposite direction, and in retrospect it fucked up a few opportunities I had.
However, I just realized that I've unintentionally simped a few times since then. One example that comes to mind is when I bought two concert tickets (on ebay, so I wasn't out that much money) for a certain artist that I liked and that I knew this one girl also liked. Then I made up some story about how my friend that I planned to go with had to work, and now I had an extra ticket, and did she want it.
She was resistant to the idea of taking it for free, and I wondered about that at first, but I realize now that I was totally trying to set up a stealth date with her, and she was trying to block that.
This was about four years ago.
I did this from around the end of my freshman year until around my junior year, after I realized what I had been doing earlier. I definitely swung too hard in the opposite direction, and in retrospect it fucked up a few opportunities I had.
Mr.Squirrel
Tom
Simps never prosper b. Remember that and you'll be gucci
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