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UK/R.O.I GAF - Thread of geopolitical confusion
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Musha_Soturi
Member
Then who am I gonna go with?
SmokyDave(s lady)
Musha_Soturi
Member
Well, as long as Dave doesn't mind, I'm happy with this.
I imagine Dave's missus being very fit.
CHEEZMO
Obsidian fan
Do you like peroxide blondes with bad boob jobs and fake tan?
Apart from the countless women I speak to but never manage to get their contact details, I recall speaking to this amazing Spanish girl (gorgeous accent) on a plane headed to the US when I was 17. There was a queue to the bathrooms and I approached her and made a comment about how its weird that everyone is heading to the bathroom at this time. She laughed and then we talked about our plans in the US. She said she was meeting her family and doing some sight-seeing. Eventually, it was her turn to enter the toilet and when she came out I mentioned how great it was talking to her before heading into the bathroom. Several hours later the plane landed and we bumped into each other again as we got off the plane and continued talking while queuing at passport control. I got my passport checked and I was cleared. I decided to wait for her while the border control policeman checked her passport. She eventually crossed borders and as we were about to get our luggage an airport security lady and a customs officer took her away to some room. Just before she entered she turned around, smiled and we made eye contact for the last time before the door was slammed shut.
zomgbbqftw
Banned
CHEEZMO;41488664 said:
Err, uncalled for?
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Your story made my heart hurt a little. And that was the last she was ever seen of....
Naaaah, that's exactly what you ought to expect given my propensity for the lap dancer look.
You'd be totally wrong though, I like my eye candy brassy and my real woman classy.
I can't post a picture because A; she's a pillar of our community, and B; she'd break my fucking face. Break it into tiny weeny little pieces. Then she'd eat the pieces, just to throw them up and teach me a lesson.
Musha_Soturi
Member
Pillar of our..... wait is she Chinner?
Seriously though, why would she have an issue with us knowing what she looked like?
Sorry, when I say 'our community', I mean where we live IRL. The net is a small place with reverse image search and the like and I wouldn't want her being connected to some of the things I've said 'round these parts.
I don't know if she'd have an issue really but I would so it's something of a moot point.
blahblah...blah
Member
Holy fucking shit. The one with the first girl in the school nurse's room isn't bad (you were, by the sounds of it, a young teenager - you can't expect to be smooth!) but getting engaged after 3 weeks, at the age of 18/19?
EDIT: Oh shit, Pete was the second 'friend'?! This just got even more mental!
CHEEZMO™;41488664 said:
EDIT: Now I understand the context, it's not quite so bad!
I assume he means the community in which he lives
EDIT: Yup
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
I think Mike specialises in blowing minds.
I DID keep looking out for her - you're right, though - I would've expected to see her about at some point. I was there for over a year after that, and then another year in 6th form before she went off to college, so it's odd that I didn't.
Musha_Soturi
Member
Ah ok. But she's on Gaf right? (Hi Dave's fit missus!)
I guess we'll just have to use our imaginations...
Yeah, I was young and foolish back then. Not as young as I should've been to be that useless at talking to girls, to be honest.
No, slight confusion about who is who there - Pete wasn't the second friend, the guy who I'd want to do the comic that Jed said I should about the first story is the guy in the second story who Laura slept with that caused me to (finally) break up with her, which is why it would be awkward to have him draw a comic about my sexual failures.
I'm getting a Spaced vibe from this story and I love it. If the rest of your life is anything like Spaced, can we get a flat together or something?
I really wanted to 'shop a blonde wig onto my avatar when I read that. Bit too lazy though, you'll have to imagine it.
blahblah...blah
Member
If the friend of Danny Boyle's son is around, he might be able to help us out with some Photoshopping.
Hang on a minute - coming from you?! With that thread a few months ago?!!?
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Which would have gone just fine of not for you dropping knowledge bombs lol! Actually no, it was Sentry that did it. Started off as a good gently pervy/nosy thread but he had to be a douche and dig up picks, the prat.
But all is good, we never would have got in touch otherwise
Which would have gone just fine of not for you dropping knowledge bombs lol! Actually no, it was Sentry that did it. Started off as a good gently pervy/nosy thread but he had to be a douche and dig up picks, the prat.
But all is good, we never would have got in touch otherwise
This is true - that picture freaked me out so much. I was kinda disappointed that it wasn't them you were talking about, to be honest. Would've been truly mindblowing if so.
How did everything end up going with that, anyhow?
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Nothing. I can never think of a good reason to bring it up with the guy. And going by what he's said recently it could well be his cheating profile or something, it really doesn't seem like something his gf would be into. He got in major major trouble recently for getting blackout drunk and a little too handsy with a bunch of people at a party. As far as we know he didn't even do anything particularly bad and it still nearly ended his relationship. So if I ask him about this it could be opening a whole can of worms!
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
There was a perhaps ill advised thread that I started, check my profile for it. Just don't bump the thing ffs
zomgbbqftw
Banned
There was a perhaps ill advised thread that I started, check my profile for it. Just don't bump the thing ffs
I remember it now, the dating site thread...
blahblah...blah
Member
And now I've read half of it and found out more unexpected stuff about Musha than Jedeye. When I found out how many of my female friends had done similar stuff to each other, I nearly died of happiness!
EDIT: Holy shit, Jedeye and Mikeside connection!
EDIT 2: They met at bowling?! AAAAAAAAAAAAH
EDIT 3: Jedeye wedding pictures - you're a cute couple, but have you ever considered shaving the beard
EDIT 4: Jedeye gets a pass for wedding pictures, but otherwise I want to reiterate how creepy the whole "show your other half to internet strangers" concept is.
EDIT: Holy shit, Jedeye and Mikeside connection!
EDIT 2: They met at bowling?! AAAAAAAAAAAAH
EDIT 3: Jedeye wedding pictures - you're a cute couple, but have you ever considered shaving the beard
EDIT 4: Jedeye gets a pass for wedding pictures, but otherwise I want to reiterate how creepy the whole "show your other half to internet strangers" concept is.
I was wrong. Today was okay.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
I'm glad I'm not the only one who overshared in there. That thread worries me, I just googled myself and freaked the fuck out haha. Note to self: never let employers find out my handle.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
And now I've read half of it and found out more unexpected stuff about Musha than Jedeye. When I found out how many of my female friends had done similar stuff to each other, I nearly died of happiness!
EDIT: Holy shit, Jedeye and Mikeside connection!
EDIT 2: Jedeye wedding pictures - you're a cute couple, but have you ever considered shaving the beard
EDIT 3: They met at bowling?! AAAAAAAAAAAAH
lol glad you enjoyed it mate
When Mike showed up I did freak out mildly.I'm officially not allowed to get rid of the beard under strict orders. I play around with it a lot though, I'm currently rocking the shaved head big beard look at the moment (although my head is currently fuzzy not shaved). Tbh my beard is far too neatly trimmed for the wedding, it's usually a bit chunkier as befits my face. That fucked up 8bit gif I posted at the weekend is me now.
Hot Coldman
Banned
And tomorrow will be better!
Oh shit, i just remembered my biggest love story fail. Like a repressed memory sprung upon me, while its no MikeIronside story its OK.
So, the year is 2009, me and 6 other friends are on a ungodly hour flight the ungodly holiday resort of Kavos in Corfu. Now this plane has 2 aisles of 3 seats each, my 6 friends all get tickets for Row A and im stuck on my own in Row B. I spend the next 15 minutes staring at everyone getting on the plane praying i don't get stuck next to 2 fat Americans with body odor issues. However, the very 2 last people that get on the plane are 2 girls around my age (18/19), i cheered up abit. They sat down, my friends in the row in front, clearly not showing signs of a decent drinking session in the pub at Gatwick are about as subtle as a brick at showing there opinions on me being in the situation (Everything from wolf whistles to requests to swap seats).
Anyway, the 2 girls, a blonde and brunette, the blonde is a nice looking girl, really sweet just moved to Devon and is going on holiday with her friend from home, which takes us to the brunette. She is an absolute stunner, she was so far out of my league it might as well have been a different sport. Her name was Poppy and was from High Wycombe, long, rich brown flowing locks, mystical green eyes, wearing a red pokadot dress with a blue cardigan. After some small talk i decide to invent a fear of flying, this leads to some light hearted banter, breaks the ice and she then jokingly holds my hand on takeoff. (How cute). Anyway the flight is alot of fun, we talk alot, play some snap on the back of my friends chair and there is some heavy flirting going on. Just before landing i learn she is staying in a different part of the island to us but they intend on coming up to Kavos for a few of the bar crawls.
Now, for whatever the reason, when the plane lands i have a brain aneurysm, the girls are hanging about waiting for the good byes, i hug both and say "Well, maybe i'll see you out one night". No request for a number, no facebook request NOTHING. What the fuck was i thinking.
And as if not to blow it enough, on the coach to our accommodation (Read: Roach motel) i manage to completely not notice she was on the same coach and smashed her round the back on the head with my hand luggage as i got off. I never saw her again
So, Poppy, if you're out there...
(Fuck you guys for bringing back this painful memory)
So, the year is 2009, me and 6 other friends are on a ungodly hour flight the ungodly holiday resort of Kavos in Corfu. Now this plane has 2 aisles of 3 seats each, my 6 friends all get tickets for Row A and im stuck on my own in Row B. I spend the next 15 minutes staring at everyone getting on the plane praying i don't get stuck next to 2 fat Americans with body odor issues. However, the very 2 last people that get on the plane are 2 girls around my age (18/19), i cheered up abit. They sat down, my friends in the row in front, clearly not showing signs of a decent drinking session in the pub at Gatwick are about as subtle as a brick at showing there opinions on me being in the situation (Everything from wolf whistles to requests to swap seats).
Anyway, the 2 girls, a blonde and brunette, the blonde is a nice looking girl, really sweet just moved to Devon and is going on holiday with her friend from home, which takes us to the brunette. She is an absolute stunner, she was so far out of my league it might as well have been a different sport. Her name was Poppy and was from High Wycombe, long, rich brown flowing locks, mystical green eyes, wearing a red pokadot dress with a blue cardigan. After some small talk i decide to invent a fear of flying, this leads to some light hearted banter, breaks the ice and she then jokingly holds my hand on takeoff. (How cute). Anyway the flight is alot of fun, we talk alot, play some snap on the back of my friends chair and there is some heavy flirting going on. Just before landing i learn she is staying in a different part of the island to us but they intend on coming up to Kavos for a few of the bar crawls.
Now, for whatever the reason, when the plane lands i have a brain aneurysm, the girls are hanging about waiting for the good byes, i hug both and say "Well, maybe i'll see you out one night". No request for a number, no facebook request NOTHING. What the fuck was i thinking.
And as if not to blow it enough, on the coach to our accommodation (Read: Roach motel) i manage to completely not notice she was on the same coach and smashed her round the back on the head with my hand luggage as i got off. I never saw her again
So, Poppy, if you're out there...
(Fuck you guys for bringing back this painful memory)
JonathanEx
Member
Jeremy Hunt exclusive! He is currently listening to Joe McEldery ruin songs. More as it breaks. Girlfriend is proud she didn't kick him cos we have media passes
Hot Coldman
Banned
Go whisper "Believe" in his ear, and I'll buy you Rollercoaster Rampage on Steam
lol glad you enjoyed it mate
I'm glad I wasn't the only one freaking out about that!
blahblah...blah
Member
You were literally sorted by this point! Still, you sound like you can be pretty charming, so I wouldn't dwell on it.
My defense is I'd already been awake over 24 hours by that point. My friends made me feel better anyway "Why would you want a girlfriend the day you land in Kavos" They were right.
Musha_Soturi
Member
Oh yeah, I forgot that was in that thread.
I really am a bit too open on here.
JonathanEx
Member
He has gone backstage but infiltration attempts will continue later.
Redgrave does not look like a McEldery fan either.
lolol, it happens to me all the freakin' time. I keep thinking "Today is the day I'll get to sit next to a normal person" but nope, every...time!
She held your hand though. Wasted mile high opportunity there! (Is it even realistically possible to join the mile high club in today's planes?)
As long as we get a Miniature Schnauzer and have frequent slow-mo shootouts.
Wait, you threw up while making out or after? Nice!
I've started doing "urban gardening" on my Juliette Balcony. I've got enough space for 5 medium sized troughs and just filled 2 with compost today!
I've always wanted to do this kind of thing, it might look really pretty after I make some progress. Certainly much better than everyone else's boring balconies!
Only planted Coriander so far, but I'm gonna do all of the staple herbs (parsley, lemongrass etc) and maybe some lavender.
*pics removed because I don't want Cheezmo stalking me*
Any tips?
I've always wanted to do this kind of thing, it might look really pretty after I make some progress. Certainly much better than everyone else's boring balconies!
Only planted Coriander so far, but I'm gonna do all of the staple herbs (parsley, lemongrass etc) and maybe some lavender.
*pics removed because I don't want Cheezmo stalking me*
Any tips?
JonathanEx
Member
Update: could not infiltrate Jeremy. Attempted to shout believe by a live BBC Radio dude. Confirmation later.
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