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Girl/Dating Age Part 2: A combined effort to give advice for those in need
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TheVampire
Banned
wtf just do it
Already did
It was obviously awkward for her when she learned of my age. It was her who told me we shouldn't continue talking and just pretend this never happened xD The point of the story was just that people seem to look at facebook communication with different eyes depending on age and location, something this thread doesn't seem to understand.mescalineeyes
Banned
there's some girls out there who very rarely check their phones. my girlfriend is one of them and it annoys me to no end. she has promised betterment and is actually delivering on it to some extent.
don't let it rile you up. and put your phone on mute when you go to bed!
Hausmeister
Neo Member
Yesterday I send a merry-christmas-SMS to a girl I like. Didn't get a reply. Christmas is miserable.
there's some girls out there who very rarely check their phones. my girlfriend is one of them and it annoys me to no end. she has promised betterment and is actually delivering on it to some extent.
don't let it rile you up. and put your phone on mute when you go to bed!
Haha, yeah you're right. I never bring it up, but this girl is constantly apologizing about it.
oh, and Merry Christmas girl-age.
Ok? What do you expect her to reply? You said Merry Christmas. That's it. She gets more of those from other people I suppose. Most people look at those type of messages and say "oh ecurb sent me a merry christmas message". That's it.
Liquid_015
Gold Member
Dear GAF, Merry X-Mas to all!
Back on topic, I have posted my situation A few times before in this thread. And so, I will not beat the dead horse again; however, I will quickly sum up what has transpired up until finals week.
She told me she would exclusively "screw" this one guy who I know ( indirectly since we only had a class together, but we hardly ever interacted).
Secondly, she told me how she would flirt and act cute with this one guy who is a senior in college.
It can be interpreted in many ways, as she can be simply pulling my leg and GAF, as already stated to "Bail Out".
Up until recently, during finals week in college she has opened up quite a bit. One reason why we were meeting up more often was because I was working on a final video art project and I needed an actress, so to speak. All of a sudden, she was under an "annual depression" as she coined it. And we were meeting up much more often for dinner than usual, sometimes she would bring a friend and mostly it would be the Two of us. Regardless, one day during dinner she told me why she was depressed: something happened between her and her friends where they directly told her that they will no longer be hanging out with each other. The girl I like said that she cannot believe that her friends are so "two-face", and she also added that I wasn't like her "two-face" friends. Of course, I was like "you still have me and all", and stuff regarding friends to smooth things out for her emotionally. During dinner time, we would talk about random stuff ranging from professors to making random faces. Haha, I really do enjoy her company.
I don't really know what to make of this.
Sorry for the wall of text. And thanks for reading/listening.
Back on topic, I have posted my situation A few times before in this thread. And so, I will not beat the dead horse again; however, I will quickly sum up what has transpired up until finals week.
She told me she would exclusively "screw" this one guy who I know ( indirectly since we only had a class together, but we hardly ever interacted).
Secondly, she told me how she would flirt and act cute with this one guy who is a senior in college.
It can be interpreted in many ways, as she can be simply pulling my leg and GAF, as already stated to "Bail Out".
Up until recently, during finals week in college she has opened up quite a bit. One reason why we were meeting up more often was because I was working on a final video art project and I needed an actress, so to speak. All of a sudden, she was under an "annual depression" as she coined it. And we were meeting up much more often for dinner than usual, sometimes she would bring a friend and mostly it would be the Two of us. Regardless, one day during dinner she told me why she was depressed: something happened between her and her friends where they directly told her that they will no longer be hanging out with each other. The girl I like said that she cannot believe that her friends are so "two-face", and she also added that I wasn't like her "two-face" friends. Of course, I was like "you still have me and all", and stuff regarding friends to smooth things out for her emotionally. During dinner time, we would talk about random stuff ranging from professors to making random faces. Haha, I really do enjoy her company.
I don't really know what to make of this.
Sorry for the wall of text. And thanks for reading/listening.
But there's only 6 more days left, lol.
Oh Jambi, I got stories to tell. Some funny, some depressing, all of which are too long and obnoxious to post.
Anyway, I'm sorry I've been absent from this thread. First it was Gears 3. Then I got a new job. I hope everyone is happy or atleast on their way to finding happiness. As for me, I've been "okay", but not great. No matter how many girls I see, go on dates with and whatnot, I STILL can't get over my ex from September (ie, the girl I was with since May, but turned out to be a lesbian). I've felt kinda shitty for the passed few weeks, even more so the last few days.
I have a good amount of experience with females and have had longer relationships than the last one, but this girl....something about her I just can't get over.
You're one of the girls, she loves you like a brother, etc.
Don't expect anything of this.
It'd be polite to respond in kind at the very least, right?
I sent out about 15 text messages to close friends yesterday wishing them a merry xmas and almost all of them responded within minutes.Merry Xmas girl-age
Next year's gonna be amazing for everyone! If it's the last year until doomsday, it better be Lots of people suffer from an "annual" depression, but most often it is referred to seasonal depression. Wouldn't surprise me if she did as well.
Now to your main point, if you want to be more than friends with this girl you are going to have to make your intentions known soon. It's pretty clear to me that she thinks of you as a friend right now, especially with the stuff going on with her other friends. She might think of you as more but most of the time a girl won't act on it until they know a guy feels the same. Some girls are a lot more forward which makes things easier but that doesn't happen often. You won't know for sure unless you do something. Even something as subtle as touching her leg and seeing how she responds will work. Especially if you don't want to risk saying something that might cause you to lose the friendship.
Liquid_015
Gold Member
Sorry I've been working all day, so that would mean I'm only a friend??
@Jambi:
The thing is, I've known her since my second semester of my freshmen year til now ( sophomore going to 2nd semester). And the saddest godamn part is the fact that I can't seem to let of her. There's just something to her that makes me extremely attracted to her. -_-'
Yes sir. You are in the friend zone. Nothing more. If you try to get out and make a move on her it might ruin your friendship with her.
obijkenobi
Member
Just wanted to comment on the seasonal depression thing. I do get that. Part of that is I grew up living in south Texas where it's sunny all year and also in the central time zone. In, MI, at least to me, it feels like when i go to work it's dark and when I come home its dark. And even on weekends it FEELS like its always cloudy...so yeah it's a real thing.
FYI, I counter those feelings with working out, going out for drinks every so often, and charity work.
Liquid_015
Gold Member
That's the thing that was holding me back on making a move. I was afraid to lose her as a friend if I ever made a move. Nearing the end if this semester, I just couldn't stand it anymore and I nearly wanted to tell her that I really genuinely like her. Sometimes I think I'm too godamn passive when it comes to these things.
You know what I meant god dammit lol.
And I know that feeling. I was stuck that way for a long time after my ex fiance. Everything just lead back to her no matter what I tried. I had plenty of relationships after that breakup but nothing came close to making me feel like she did. Until now anyway. This new girl is pretty much what I've been looking for since then. I'm already in it pretty deep and I'm scared as hell because of what I have been through. I'm not letting that stop me though. It just makes me apprehensive.
@Liquid Being passive when it comes to making a move is what ends up biting most guys in the ass. If you wait too long and a girl is actually into you then she will just think that you don't feel the same way. It also makes you wonder what if until you move on. You can either do something about it or just be content with being her friend. If you want a simple way to know for sure that shouldn't hurt your friendship, then try to do something with her on New Year's. When the ball drops ask her if she would like someone to kiss. Or just go for the kiss without asking. If she doesn't respond in a positive way then you can always just use New Year's as an excuse and you shouldn't need to worry about losing her as a friend.
It'd be polite to respond in kind at the very least, right?
Merry Xmas girl-age
Busy? It would be polite to respond but your message is so closed and not open for a reply. She really isn't obligated to respond.
By the way Merry Christmas to you and your family also
That's why when you see a girl that you like and you would like to talk to her. You flirt with her. By doing that at the beginning it let's her know your interested but more than just a friend. You didn't do that apparently. So she sees you as a friend and if you make a move now it would make her feel uncomfortable.
Don't feel bad. Just learn from this mistake, that when you approach another girl you like (which you will) you can start off flirting with her and it will go from there.
Never wait! Just do it!
Liquid_015
Gold Member
Sigh. I don't really know what to do nowadays. From what I recalled, I did kinda flirt but I guess it wasn't apparent enough. Sigh. So technically speaking, there isn't a way to reverse engineer the relationship from just being a good friend to boyfriend/girlfriend relationship?
You can try but you are already in that friend zone. When I talk about flirting. I'm talking about teasing her, complimenting her, touching and taking her out. Those are all interests (and more) and she would of seen you as a potential boyfriend. But you waited to long and she feels comfortable with you as a friend.
It would be awkward to make a move now. You can tell her how you feel but it's really a 50/50 shot. She might or might not feel the same way.
Ask her now if your that interested. But I think your to late.
Liquid_015
Gold Member
That's the strange thing. Although I know that I sm very late to the party, but I seriously think I have a chance. The reason why I am saying that is because there is this feeling my gut feeling tells me that she is most definitely interested. Maybe I should see how things roll out this coming semester?? It's getting late over here , gonna head to bed.
Go for it. Just know that there is a potential rejection. Just don't feel bad. You have to do it as soon as possible so that she doesn't lose interest completely.
Alright. Just update us whenever you get the chance.
lawlohwhat
Banned
It doesn't sound like she's interested from what you've described. There was a recent study about how men tend to overestimate the interest of girls who they are most attracted to. I think there was a gaf thread about it.
This is absolutely true. Besides, its christmas, go watch sports or cook or do something fun away from your phone!
Hope you all have a great holiday.
What beliefs are helpful to reach this point?
Just feel good about yourself. Do things that make you happy and worry about other people later. Too many people (both guys and girls) try putting other people before themselves and it ends up leading to situations where you are sitting by your phone waiting for someone. I'm not saying that it is bad to put others before you, but don't make your life all about that. People are a lot more attractive when they have their lives together than when they don't. Take care of yourself first, and the relationship part of your life will follow. Soultron made a good post about this a couple of days ago.
Boozeroony
Member
I've got some awkward advice to ask, but some of my friends/relatives may be lurking. Shit, I never should've told 'em about GAF in the first place.
CherryWoodFuton
Member
Merry Xmas and Happy New Year Girl-Age. Been seeing this girl for a week and spent xmas eve at her place and had an awesome make out session. Having something click like this is an awesome feeling. Thanks you guys for all the advice
Ask some of us regulars in PM form perhaps
This thread must be read by the guys in here. It's absolutely hilarious and gives great insight on what it's like to put women on pedestals! Don't be the guy in the story!
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=456721
elrechazado
Banned
RedHerring
Neo Member
So guys, any Christmas romance stories?
Also, for anyone hung up on an ex, never forget, the beat goes on.
Also, for anyone hung up on an ex, never forget, the beat goes on.
CherryWoodFuton
Member
Do PM!
Boozeroony
Member
edit:nvm
Larson Conway
Member
LordPhoque
Banned
So there is this new girl at my student job, which is into me I think (not going to say why but let's just say she shows pretty obvious signs of interest), and I'm kind of interested in her too. She's an interim so she won't be here long, so I'd like to ask her out. Problem is, it's a very busy job, so we don't get to have a lot of privacy. How would you do it GAF ?
Ask her for her contact number. Or you can simply ask "what are you doing this weekend?" "I wanted to know if you like to go out and catch a movie or for a cup if coffee". Simple. That way she will give you her number.
Your just asking for a casual get together to get to know her. If she evades trying to hang out. Then move on.
You gotta get rid of your negative and limiting beliefs first, before you can implement positive ones. Otherwise, your mind will be in constant conflict, as it's possible to hold 2 beliefs that are on the opposite ends of the spectrum
i used the free thing on pstec.org to get rid of my negative beliefs
Do you have a link to that free course?
Sanky Panky
Banned
This will sound douchey, but while she is in this emotional rut and during the holidays, invite her out to party/drinks, get her drunk, and make a move. You are nothing more than a friend right now, and you need something drastic to move things along.
Three things might happen:
a) she rejects you outright, and you can blame it on being drunk. Friendship can be salvaged, and you know where you stand.
b) she makes out with you, and starts to feel something for you (not very likely, but it's worth a shot)
c) she makes out with you and tells you the next time that she doesn't have feelings for you (this one is the worst). Friendship doomed but at least you hooked up.
Of course, you know the best option, but refuse to acknowledge it. BAIL OUT.
it's right on the front page
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
Got friendzoned recently because I was too much of a pansy to make a move and instead got stuck in friend mode for too long. Also, I get the feeling she thinks I'm gay because I talk about fashion and etc with her. I can't help that, it's what I'm into.
This is why you gotta go for the kiss early on and be kino.
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
I don't believe in kino though.
It needs to be subtle enough, not too corny to make it awkward. Makes you more comfortable with each other.
LightOfTruth
Member
Not much worse than having the girl you like ask you if you like someone. Oh well.
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