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[User 479360]

I'm single, and have dodged a bullet.

She never replied to my texts yesterday, after saying we should go out for food the night before (food on Saturday since Friday didn't work). Then, my friend told me that she'd changed her relationship status on Facebook, so I did as well and also deleted her as a friend.

I want my $95 back :'(

 

[Gray Matter]

I'm single, and have dodged a bullet.

She never replied to my texts yesterday, after saying we should go out for food the night before (food on Saturday since Friday didn't work). Then, my friend told me that she'd changed her relationship status on Facebook, so I did as well and also deleted her as a friend.

I want my $95 back :'(

Now you can go out with that other girl without feeling guilty.

 

[davepoobond]

I think I'm just about done with coffee meets bagel. It hasn't given me any good matches for the past month, mostly everyone it is showing me aren't even filling out their profiles.

It keeps pestering me to update and I don't want to do that so it won't work anymore anyway.

 

[User 479360]

I think I'm just about done with coffee meets bagel. It hasn't given me any good matches for the past month, mostly everyone it is showing me aren't even filling out their profiles.

It keeps pestering me to update and I don't want to do that so it won't work anymore anyway.

That's too bad

Does it require Facebook? I hate attaching accounts to apps.

 

[Gray Matter]

I hate CMB. Only one match per day and every single one I've gotten has been in different states. Makes no sense.

 

[davepoobond]

That's too bad

Does it require Facebook? I hate attaching accounts to apps.

Yes, only as verification and to show any mutual friends.

I hate CMB. Only one match per day and every single one I've gotten has been in different states. Makes no sense.

I liked it because it draws the "arms race" of online dating back a lot. It definitely evens the playing field towards guys since women can't just get spammed by everyone and they can only pay attention to one a day.

I got a couple of actual dates from it (they went nowhere) and a couple of numbers that ended up nowhere as well. Seems about time to take a break from it since it seems like I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel.

 

[User 479360]

Yes, only as verification and to show any mutual friends.



I liked it because it draws the "arms race" of online dating back a lot. It definitely evens the playing field towards guys since women can't just get spammed by everyone and they can only pay attention to one a day.

I got a couple of actual dates from it (they went nowhere) and a couple of numbers that ended up nowhere as well. Seems about time to take a break from it since it seems like I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Okay. Thanks for the reply.

I'm just always worried about the safety of such things.

 

[Gray Matter]

Got a match on tinder, cute, near by (if the location can be trusted), loves pink floyd (just like I do), responded to my message within minutes.

I must be dreaming.

 

[davepoobond]

Okay. Thanks for the reply.

I'm just always worried about the safety of such things.

Meh, it's fine. As long as it ain't sketchy and you have 2-factor on you shouldn't worry too much.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

Just make a fake FB account.

I'm sure having a different name isn't a dealbreaker for potential matches.

 

[Makai]

I just started an OK Cupid account and it's my first experience with online dating. It's exciting just to watch the likes roll in. I found that you can even see who liked you by checking the source code.

 

[User 479360]

Just make a fake FB account.

I'm sure having a different name isn't a dealbreaker for potential matches.

I did for Tinder, but coffee meets bagel apparently uses friend data and interests.

 

[Gray Matter]

Been having a really good conversation with a really cute girl on tinder. We've been talking about pink floyd all this time, it's so easy when there's something in common.

 

[AdaWong]

Reading through this thread is somewhat cute, I must say. Makes me smile when things work out for other people.

 

[GrizzNKev]

Met someone great through CMB. Trying to talk my way into a first date. I like the way the app works. If you're patient, it's pretty good.

 

[ClosingADoor]

I did for Tinder, but coffee meets bagel apparently uses friend data and interests.

Tinder does the same. You see if someone is friends with the same people as you are and shares the same interest. They probably use the interests in the background to do some matching stuff.

 

[User 479360]

Tinder does the same. You see if someone is friends with the same people as you are and shares the same interest. They probably use the interests in the background to do some matching stuff.

Oh, okay. I didn't know that.

 

[Gray Matter]

Oh, okay. I didn't know that.

Are you coming back to the game or will you take a break?

 

[User 479360]

Are you coming back to the game or will you take a break?

I'm still in the game, talking to girls from before and sending out new messages.

I've learned lessons, though, for sure. Like not spending too much, not jumping into things and trying not to get angry when things fall apart. I did send my 'ex' a message, though it wasn't nasty or mean.

 

[ClosingADoor]

I'm still in the game, talking to girls from before and sending out new messages.

I've learned lessons, though, for sure. Like not spending too much, not jumping into things and trying not to get angry when things fall apart. I did send my 'ex' a message, though it wasn't nasty or mean.

Good luck. Never get angry about this stuff, it only makes you feel worse and let it get to you. If things don't work out, there are reasons for that and you can't change it anyway.

Do try to arrange meetups earlier. You mentioned earlier talking like two months with people if I remember right. Arrange a date earlier, within a week or two. This will filter out the people not really interested quicker and you don't built up this image of the girl in your head, since people can be totally different in real life compared to texting and such.

 

[stn]

I'm a white guy. Got messaged today by a girl who has in her profile that she's not into white guys. She's white. Mind blown. People are weird and indecisive as hell sometimes.

 

[Symphonia]

I'm a white guy. Got messaged today by a girl who has in her profile that she's not into white guys. She's white. Mind blown. People are weird and indecisive as hell sometimes.

And totally fucking hypocritical to boot.

 

[Gray Matter]

Need some advice GAF.

Yesterday had a match with this really cute girl. Messaged her and had what I perceive as a good conversation, had some things in common. Then this morning I messaged her again with no reply yet. Should I send a follow up message like "how was your day" or something like that?

 

[Makai]

Need some advice GAF.

Yesterday had a match with this really cute girl. Messaged her and had what I perceive as a good conversation, had some things in common. Then this morning I messaged her again with no reply yet. Should I send a follow up message like "how was your day" or something like that?

No

 

[Gray Matter]

No

Why is the answer always no?

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Why is the answer always no?

Is this the Pink Floyd girl from Tinder?

Anyway, you need to arrange a meet-up quickly (even if it's a coffee date) or, at the very least, obtain the girl's number so you can start texting. I don't use Tinder, nor will I, but it the application seems to encourage a lot of fickleness.

Don't ask, "Hey, how was your day?" If you're going to message her, be up front about things and reference the previous conversation. If it's the Pink Floyd girl, ask if she wants to listen to an album sometime, then also ask for her number.

 

[davepoobond]

Why is the answer always no?

You should have asked her to meet while you were talking to her. I always ask out after about 3 responses.

Why would you wait until the next day to do anything else? What more do you have to gain from continuing an online discussion if there are no plans to meet?

 

[Gray Matter]

Is this the Pink Floyd girl from Tinder?

Anyway, you need to arrange a meet-up quickly (even if it's a coffee date) or, at the very least, obtain the girl's number so you can start texting. I don't use Tinder, nor will I, but it the application seems to encourage a lot of fickleness.

Don't ask, "Hey, how was your day?" If you're going to message her, be up front about things and reference the previous conversation. If it's the Pink Floyd girl, ask if she wants to listen to an album sometime, then also ask for her number.

Yup, her.

You should have asked her to meet while you were talking to her. I always ask out after about 3 responses.

Why would you wait until the next day to do anything else? What more do you have to gain from continuing an online discussion if there are no plans to meet?

Our conversation was going so well that I did not want to just ruin it by asking something completely off topic.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Our conversation was going so well that I did not want to just ruin it by asking something completely off topic.

I realize this is sounds facile, but I mean this sincerely: asking to meet to continue an awesome conversation in person is completely on-topic. Additionally, you have to consider your audience: she's on Tinder because she wants to meet people for some kind of romantic encounter. This isn't bumping into a girl at random at, say, the library -- she's using that app for a specific purpose.

In other words, you're allowed to be a little bolder than usual.

 

[Gray Matter]

I realize this is sounds facile, but I mean this sincerely: asking to meet to continue an awesome conversation in person is completely on-topic. Additionally, you have to consider your audience: she's on Tinder because she wants to meet people for some kind of romantic encounter. This isn't bumping into a girl at random at, say, the library -- she's using that app for a specific purpose.

In other words, you're allowed to be a little bolder than usual.

You're right. Now I have to find a way to start up another conversation, but according to some here, sending a follow up message is forbidden lol

 

[Jhoan]

Yup, her.



Our conversation was going so well that I did not want to just ruin it by asking something completely off topic.

This sounds like an excuse. How would it be asking something completely off topic if you're both on a service with the intention to meet other people in person? The same logic that applies to real life applies to online dating as well: if the conversation is going well and you're getting great vibes, suggest exchanging numbers while the feelings are good. You miss your window of opportunity and it'll fizzle faster than ever.

I say this from personal experience that the Pink Floyd topic probably got old for her so you could at any point have changed the subject, ask what she likes to do for fun then suggest exchanging numbers. No shame making in making a move or else you're gonna be back to square one lamenting about your problems again.

 

[Gray Matter]

This sounds like an excuse. How would it be asking something completely off topic if you're both on a service with the intention to meet other people in person? The same logic that applies to real life applies to online dating as well: if the conversation is going well and you're getting great vibes, suggest exchanging numbers while the feelings are good. You miss your window of opportunity and it'll fizzle faster than ever.

I say this from personal experience that the Pink Floyd topic probably got old for her so you could at any point have changed the subject, ask what she likes to do for fun then suggest exchanging numbers. No shame making in making a move or else you're gonna be back to square one lamenting about your problems again.

This has been the one and only match that has actually had a conversation with me, I don't want to ruin it. How would I go about starting up another convo and eventually asking to meet?

 

[Makai]

Why is the answer always no?

"What happened? Why aren't you responding to me?" Just wait for her to contact you on her own accord or move on.

 

[Gray Matter]

"What happened? Why aren't you responding to me?" Just wait for her to contact you on her own accord or move on.

I wouldn't say those words. That just sounds clingy and needy, which I am not.

 

[Makai]

I wouldn't say those words. That just sounds clingy and needy, which I am not.

Same difference. If they want to talk to you, they'll respond to the first message. If they don't, let them break it off painlessly.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

I wouldn't say those words. That just sounds clingy and needy, which I am not.

Don't use those words. It's equivalent to "please respond."

Say something like this: "Sorry, got distracted running errands/working out/visiting family/walking my dog/writing papers/at work today. Really enjoyed our chat yesterday, and I'd love to continue it. How about drinks Thursday night? My number's (202) 555-1212."

 

[Gray Matter]

Don't use those words. It's equivalent to "please respond."

Say something like this: "Sorry, got distracted running errands/working out/visiting family/walking my dog/writing papers/at work today. Really enjoyed our chat yesterday, and I'd love to continue it. How about drinks Thursday night? My number's (202) 555-1212."

She's the one who hasn't responded, so I don't know how to go on.

 

[Lulubop]

Getting like zero matches I Tinder these days, was getting 10+ before about two weeks ago. I feel like it's putting me at the bottom of the pile. I don't have any threads going on right now so I might reset it.

Had like 6 okc convos going but they all seemingly stopped today.

That Ukrainian girl is cool and all but she has a lying problem. Will be leaving that a lone.

Sad times.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

She's the one who hasn't responded, so I don't know how to go on.

Just like I said. Don't overthink it. It basically means you would've followed up, but didn't, and yet, you're still following up. ... I realize that's convoluted, mind you. If you just want to take out the first part, that's fine too.

 

[Jhoan]

This has been the one and only match that has actually had a conversation with me, I don't want to ruin it. How would I go about starting up another convo and eventually asking to meet?

Eh, keep getting at it. It's the start of more to come.

Either pretend like nothing ever happened and change the subject to another question or just flat out suggest meeting up in the weekend. Like Advocatus Diaboli said, you're overthinking about it. Do it.

 

[ZombiePlatypus]

As a gay guy, whenever I see a girl come up in my OKCupid or Tinder matches, I always have an initial moment of confusion where I'm not sure if said person is in really, really polished drag, or is just a girl who mixed up her settings on her profile.

 

[War Peaceman]

I'm a white guy. Got messaged today by a girl who has in her profile that she's not into white guys. She's white. Mind blown. People are weird and indecisive as hell sometimes.

why are you complaining?

Surely you must have a general type, yes? I dislike blondes but saw the most gorgeous blonde today. Does that make me hypocritical? There are exceptions. Maybe she liked the way you came across... Overthinking things here and being really cynical!

 

[stn]

I was more just intrigued that she would have a whole section devoted to how white guys aren't her type, only to then message a white guy. I didn't reply to her either way so it doesn't really matter! This post was more just to share a random story with everyone here.

 

[Symphonia]

I was more just intrigued that she would have a whole section devoted to how white guys aren't her type, only to then message a white guy. I didn't reply to her either way so it doesn't really matter! This post was more just to share a random story with everyone here.

I had a similar experience. A wonan had visited and liked my profile, despite being the complete opposite to her ideal match, who would be black, into RnB, and a weed smoker. But, eh, she was hot.

 

[Gray Matter]

Eh, keep getting at it. It's the start of more to come.

Either pretend like nothing ever happened and change the subject to another question or just flat out suggest meeting up in the weekend. Like Advocatus Diaboli said, you're overthinking about it. Do it.

I'm just going to ask if she's free this weekend and ask her out.

Edit: Messaged sent. Hoping for the best, preparing for the worse.

 

[GK86]

Got myself a tinder date for Sunday. She is a year old than me. I have always dated younger, so this will be a new experience.

 

[User 479360]

Man, I'm so unused to this world. You'd think I would be, but I still have a ton to learn, as you all know.

I rejoined Tinder, and met a few nice girls. One has been talking to me a lot over that and now text, but she's told me that she's just looking for friends. We've flirted a bit, but I got the impression that she's maybe slightly interested (it is a dating site and she did choose to swipe right). But she's had a lot of bad luck with assholes and says she doesn't date and looks for friends.

That's fair. She said she's off tomorrow, and had mentioned wanting to meet and hang out if it wasn't too early for me. I don't know if we still are or not.

She knows that I am looking for a relationship, and tells me not to push so I try not to. It just comes up a bit. She said she'd kick my ass though, jokingly, with an lol.

I asked the girl who lives hours away, because we're just talking as friends due to the distance and everything. She's living her life and I'm living mine. But when I said I feel like she doesn't trust men, that pissed this other girl off because it's apparently offensive.

Another girl messaged me on PoF. She's really cool and said my profile really impressed her, but she's only twenty and lives an hour away. I don't know if she's my type attraction-wise.

Please go easy on me.

 

[gaiages]

Chewie - for the girl that only wants to be friends, no romance, are you okay with that? Like someone said in the other thread, it'd probably be great if you had some female friends, but if you're explicitly looking for more and don't want to settle for 'just friends', then maybe you should at least rethink seeing her. Or, as long as you don't mind looking for actual ladies to date while you're talking to this friend.

Also, why do you think that the hours away girl distrusts men? That seems kinda outta nowhere. I'm the type of person that really places people being honest with me above all else, but if a guy I never met in real life said that to me, I'd be a bit miffed as well.

 

[stn]

Man, I'm so unused to this world. You'd think I would be, but I still have a ton to learn, as you all know.

I rejoined Tinder, and met a few nice girls. One has been talking to me a lot over that and now text, but she's told me that she's just looking for friends. We've flirted a bit, but I got the impression that she's maybe slightly interested (it is a dating site and she did choose to swipe right). But she's had a lot of bad luck with assholes and says she doesn't date and looks for friends.

That's fair. She said she's off tomorrow, and had mentioned wanting to meet and hang out if it wasn't too early for me. I don't know if we still are or not.

She knows that I am looking for a relationship, and tells me not to push so I try not to. It just comes up a bit. She said she'd kick my ass though, jokingly, with an lol.

I asked the girl who lives hours away, because we're just talking as friends due to the distance and everything. She's living her life and I'm living mine. But when I said I feel like she doesn't trust men, that pissed this other girl off because it's apparently offensive.

Another girl messaged me on PoF. She's really cool and said my profile really impressed her, but she's only twenty and lives an hour away. I don't know if she's my type attraction-wise.

Please go easy on me.

Based on what I've read from all your past posts, I think you should actually focus on finding girls who want to be friends. Having friends is usually a precursor to relationships because it teaches you many social skills. It would do you good to expand your social circle. She's probably BS'ing about the whole friends thing. But still, pretend like she's not and use it to become naturally comfortable around girls.

 

[Lulubop]

Reset my Tinder,

I haven't had a Saturday night off in like a month. I def need a date.