I know everyone loves Amazon's shipping stories. Here is mine:
You are now connected to X from Amazon.ca
Me: Why hasn't this shipped yet? The game came out on Tuesday.
X: Hello, my name is X. I'm here to help you today.
I understand your concern. Could you please confirm the name of the item so that I will be able to check that for you.
Me: Far cry 3
X: Okay, could you please confirm the order number?
Me: [######] Sorry. It is just cause 3.. Not far cry 3
X: Okay, thank you. I've checked and see that you've placed an order with "Free shipping" which is the slowest shipping available and that's the reason the item is taking time to ship. I apologize for the inconvenience.
Would you want me to upgrade the shipping for you?
Me: The item hasn't been shipped yet though. The speed doesn't matter yet.
X: It does. When it is upgraded shipping, the item ships on priority.
However, I see that the item is in the advanced shipping stage. Please be assured that you will receive the item by the end of Thursday, December 10, 2015.
Me: That is ridiculous. You are basically holding my item hostage unless I pay to get it sent out now. How do you think that makes me feel?
X: I didn't mean that. If you asked me to upgrade the shipping and considering that fact that you've been a loyal customer since 2005, we could waive off the shipping charges for you.
Me: If it gets to me quicker and doesn't cost me, then fine.
X: Maybe I wasn't clear earlier. Please stay connected while I upgrade the shipping to make up for the inconvenience.
Thank you for waiting. I've just contacted the shipping department and confirm that your order is in the advanced stage on shipping. Since it's already in the shipping stage we wouldn't be able to upgrade the shipping.
However, to make up for the inconvenience, I could upgrade the shipping for the other 2 games in your order.
Me: Ok thanks.
I still have Fallout to finish off but it is pretty ridiculous that it takes this long to ship a game when my normal Amazon orders are received in a day or two.