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Fake Picture GAF v9 — No Man's Thirst

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Fluvian

Banned
I could tell lewd stories that would set the thread on fire

But I have too much discretion and so I bear this burden alone

One time this girl made me hose her down with my pee, some of it got in her mouth and she grabbed the back of my head and forced me to kiss like snowballing, i usually like snowballing.....Took ages to get the taste of my own piss out of my mouth.....try my with these supposedly fire starting stories.
 
Same lol

There's just something about letting someone take control and you don't have to worry about it that's awesome

Nice boys! *high five* :3

In all fairness, some people actually enjoy pegging because it makes them feel emasculated. To each their own.

Hm true. Though I guess in that situation it's still kind of sexist? Them enjoying being emasculated is because that's the wrong role for a girl, but why should the girl not be allowed to do that? I dunno. I'm overthinking pegging of all things, hahaha
 

Fluvian

Banned
Okay I never did that

I'm talking more garden variety steamy

Oh...I was kinda hoping you were going to argue that you're stories were more hardcore, was going to tell some of my gay/cross dresser stories.
Fuck it I will anyway, so one time I hooked up with this gorgeous girl and I end up back at her place, so were fucking and something just wasn't right, it was super dark, she would only let me take her from behind, etc.
So about halfway through I flipped the lamp on and of course it was a cross dresser, he thought I was going to leave and of course I didn't appreciate not being told he was a guy but I was so attracted to him I kept going and finished, great night.
 

SolVanderlyn

Thanos acquires the fully powered Infinity Gauntlet in The Avengers: Infinity War, but loses when all the superheroes team up together to stop him.
I already told my lewdest story in here when I was inebriated once, against my better judgement,
of which I have none when I am drinking
 

Jobbs

Banned
Oh...I was kinda hoping you were going to argue that you're stories were more hardcore, was going to tell some of my gay/cross dresser stories.
Fuck it I will anyway, so one time I hooked up with this gorgeous girl and I end up back at her place, so were fucking and something just wasn't right, it was super dark, she would only let me take her from behind, etc.
So about halfway through I flipped the lamp on and of course it was a cross dresser, he thought I was going to leave and of course I didn't appreciate not being told he was a guy but I was so attracted to him I kept going and finished, great night.

my stuff is hetero monogamous stuff, so boring in broad subject matter, but the actual details are super great. I'm just not comfortable sharing publicly atm
 

Fluvian

Banned
my stuff is hetero monogamous stuff, so boring in broad subject matter, but the actual details are super great. I'm just not comfortable sharing publicly atm

I think I'm probably more willing to share because you guys still barely know who I am, I think maybe one of you knows my real name and that's about it.
 

Zero²

Member
The gym is no place for friendship! it's a place for quite angry reflection.

This is what I need. or a personal trainer

Solution: let's all be each others gym buddies :D

...what do you mean that's logistically impossible?

Just use your imaginations.

Pic unrelated:

tumblr_obomrg2c3y1u208bxo1_1280.jpg
Now now gym buds are great, but imagine the logistics of 4 gym buddies, impossible brahs.
And even setting aside that great body and body hair, I want that beard! #beardgoals
 

Jobbs

Banned
beards are easy. nothing to be proud of. you just wait.

actually shaving that shit on the reg is the hard part. that takes work
 

Numb

Member
Zero²;215966911 said:
Now now gym buds are great, but imagine the logistics of 4 gym buddies, impossible brahs.
And even setting aside that great body and body hair, I want that beard! #beardgoals

The beard takes time,patience and sacrifices
Easier than getting the body tho
 
I just can't do it, one of my first sexual experiences was being submissive and let's just say it put me off it for life, I need to be in control or at least working with the other person, just laying back and taking it does nothing for me.

You could always be a power bottom. Pegging doesn't inherently have to be submissive, just like a woman a man is having sex with doesn't. She can still be an active participant or aggressively into it, like a girl who rides on top and pushes you down.

I'm barely submissive, I'm much more of a person who has fun sharing the aggressive in a session.

Sometimes sex is pretty cool if both people are in a power role.

It's all up to the people doing it. You can make it what you want out of it.
 
Zero²;215966911 said:
Now now gym buds are great, but imagine the logistics of 4 gym buddies, impossible brahs.

We can split into two groups

...I need to decide if you staring at my butt while I do squats would be a distraction or not

beards are easy. nothing to be proud of. you just wait.

actually shaving that shit on the reg is the hard part. that takes work

fuk u :c
 

SolVanderlyn

Thanos acquires the fully powered Infinity Gauntlet in The Avengers: Infinity War, but loses when all the superheroes team up together to stop him.
I have a beard within three days if I don't shave. I fucking hate it.


This was like a month without shaving I think
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
your ones are probably some next level shit

I seemed to have missed them...





... Catch up time? ;)

Im going with no details since the other time I went a bit too detailed I suppose.

- My first college a friend said he was curious to see if he was bi and I agreed to let him suck my cock in the college restroom but was specific that no kissing was going to happen. (I was so romantic saving my first kiss awwww) He liked it and became creepy and asking when it would happen again and I would evade him and eventually he noticed I was evading and just decided to be creepier and sit on the same area I was but far and look at me interacting with my other friends.

-Gave and received a BJ in a car at a mall parking lot at 9am to then rush to college to take a test

-Got a friend in college who I would blow for 5-6 months. He still insist he is straight but he wants to repeat what happened so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

- Gave BJ 5am at a basketball court while it was raining. Both me and the hook up got sick after that lol

-Gave BJ at the beach at 12am

-Jerk off while driving (Happened first while having phone sex while driving back home from college around 2:40- 2:45pm in a rainy day and then happened a lot without any phone sex while driving back from work around 12am or 5am on my security work)

- $20 Motel with a guy with the same name as me at 5:30am before my drive to my college and was my first time topping. Bed sheets reeked of cigarettes and the texture was kinda like construction paper. Guy was lazy as fuck and I got a bonus that killed the mood.
Shit

- And finally there is my friend's dad that that wanted to have sex with me and tell me how he wanted me to dress up in women's underwear and grabbed my leg and then tried grabbing my cock and scared the fuck out of me from visiting my friend. Since my friend is in the military now I don't have to go there anymore and from what I heard the old man's health is deteriorating fast which somehow felt satisfying to hear at the moment my friend told me but I acted concerned cause I didnt want to deliver those shitty news to him.


I think that's about it and its not as crazy as you guys may have thought.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
My lewd stories are quite vanilla. I've been offered some risky stuff in the past, but it didn't feel right back then, so I didn't go through. The most I have to share are some scratches from high heels over my headboard, a bunch of bruises (some nastier than others) and a few painful accidents. And making my girlfriend do a 180 on some stuff, I guess.

Re: beards. Mine turns into steel whool after a week without proper maintenance. It can get annoying at times, specially since I'm prone to ingrown beard hairs if I don't shave every couple of days, which is too agressive for my skin.
 

Fluvian

Banned
Im going with no details since the other time I went a bit too detailed I suppose.

- My first college a friend said he was curious to see if he was bi and I agreed to let him suck my cock in the college restroom but was specific that no kissing was going to happen. (I was so romantic saving my first kiss awwww) He liked it and became creepy and asking when it would happen again and I would evade him and eventually he noticed I was evading and just decided to be creepier and sit on the same area I was but far and look at me interacting with my other friends.

-Gave and received a BJ in a car at a mall parking lot at 9am to then rush to college to take a test

-Got a friend in college who I would blow for 5-6 months. He still insist he is straight but he wants to repeat what happened so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

- Gave BJ 5am at a basketball court while it was raining. Both me and the hook up got sick after that lol

-Gave BJ at the beach at 12am

-Jerk off while driving (Happened first while having phone sex while driving back home from college around 2:40- 2:45pm in a rainy day and then happened a lot without any phone sex while driving back from work around 12am or 5am on my security work)

- $20 Motel with a guy with the same name as me at 5:30am before my drive to my college and was my first time topping. Bed sheets reeked of cigarettes and the texture was kinda like construction paper. Guy was lazy as fuck and I got a bonus that killed the mood.
Shit

- And finally there is my friend's dad that that wanted to have sex with me and tell me how he wanted me to dress up in women's underwear and grabbed my leg and then tried grabbing my cock and scared the fuck out of me from visiting my friend. Since my friend is in the military now I don't have to go there anymore and from what I heard the old man's health is deteriorating fast which somehow felt satisfying to hear at the moment my friend told me but I acted concerned cause I didnt want to deliver those shitty news to him.


I think that's about it and its not as crazy as you guys may have thought.

That first story was slightly adorable and that last story was creepy as fuck.
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
My lewd stories are quite vanilla. I've been offered some risky stuff in the past, but it didn't feel right back then, so I didn't go through. The most I have to share are some scratches from high heels over my headboard, a bunch of bruises (some nastier than others) and a few painful accidents. And making my girlfriend do a 180 on some stuff, I guess.

Re: beards. Mine turns into steel whool after a week without proper maintenance. It can get annoying at times, specially since I'm prone to ingrown beard hairs if I don't shave every couple of days, which is too agressive for my skin.

Shampoo, conditioner and moisturize that shit. It will never be super soft but sometimes all you need is to work that beard to make it glorious. Also a beard is great when
eating ass.
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
That first story was slightly adorable and that last story was creepy as fuck.

I posted in previous threads that my idiotic friend gave his dad my number and he would call me at odd hours to hang out to which I eventually just ignored his calls for the sake of my sanity. I mean who the fuck calls you at 5am to hang out? Who the fuck shows up to your house at 7am shouting your name for help on a gate (we all know that shit aint really for help) when you are most likely still sleeping cause you go to bed around 4am. And the latest developments which I didnt mentioned was that the father ended up making a facebook account to chat with me but I actually threatened his ass that I would print all the shit he was saying on chat and show to his wife and son because at best what I'll lose is a friend while he will lose is his family. After that he stopped bothering me and things are fine with my friend. Hope I dont have to deal with anything creepy like that again and more when it was actually affecting me pretty bad mentally speaking.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Shampoo, conditioner and moisturize that shit. It will never be super soft but sometimes all you need is to work that beard to make it glorious. Also a beard is great when
eating ass.
I've tried conditioner. I hate how silky it gets. It feels super weird to me, as if my hair had been replaced with some nasty fluff. It looks shiny, I guess.
The compliments about oral are real.
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
I've tried conditioner. I hate how silky it gets. It feels super weird to me, as if my hair had been replaced with some nasty fluff. It looks shiny, I guess.
The compliments about oral are real.

I like the tickling sensation the beard sometimes brings depending where is touching and it can be quite hot too when making out. Facial hair overall is great but if you want to be in a better condition is hard work.

As for the silky beard maybe try using other things for the beard since some moisturizers can do that instead of having a softer feel. I heard oil are better for the beard and maybe you can use some shea butter, coconut oil, jojoba oil and other options that make it softer and are not as silky as regular conditioner. Also make sure to wash the excess of the oil and moisturizers cause sometimes it might be that you over did it with that.
 

Fluvian

Banned
I posted in previous threads that my idiotic friend gave his dad my number and he would call me at odd hours to hang out to which I eventually just ignored his calls for the sake of my sanity. I mean who the fuck calls you at 5am to hang out? Who the fuck shows up to your house at 7am shouting your name for help on a gate (we all know that shit aint really for help) when you are most likely still sleeping cause you go to bed around 4am. And the latest developments which I didnt mentioned was that the father ended up making a facebook account to chat with me but I actually threatened his ass that I would print all the shit he was saying on chat and show to his wife and son because at best what I'll lose is a friend while he will lose is his family. After that he stopped bothering me and things are fine with my friend. Hope I dont have to deal with anything creepy like that again and more when it was actually affecting me pretty bad mentally speaking.

Yeah i've had some creepy advances from older guys but I shut that shit down fast, don't try to spare their feelings their old enough to take rejection, everyone knows that I only go for guys my age who are twinks.
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Yeah i've had some creepy advances from older guys but I shut that shit down fast, don't try to spare their feelings their old enough to take rejection, everyone knows that I only go for guys my age who are twinks.
I can go for men up to 40 as long as he has kept well and has a nice personality but the man is 60 , visually unattractive and his language usage of n***a, f****t, t****y among other things are things that dont help him and more when is not even said in a light tone. He was pretty disgusting tbh.
 

Fluvian

Banned
I can go for men up to 40 as long as he has kept well and has a nice personality but the man is 60 , visually unattractive and his language usage of n***a, f****t, t****y among other things are things that dont help him and more when is not even said in a light tone. He was pretty disgusting tbh.

Some people man, I partially feel bad for the guy because he clearly grew up in a place and time where being gay or bi wasn't accepted and he probably didn't get to exercise his sexual feelings in a healthy way, but at some point self awareness should kick in and you should know that you're being a gross prick.
 

Xiao Hu

Member
I've tried conditioner. I hate how silky it gets. It feels super weird to me, as if my hair had been replaced with some nasty fluff. It looks shiny, I guess.
The compliments about oral are real.

Lili, sorry I meant Pantene, converted me to use conditioner. Having longer hair using conditioner is a must to be frank.
 

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Some people man, I partially feel bad for the guy because he clearly grew up in a place and time where being gay or bi wasn't accepted and he probably didn't get to exercise his sexual feelings in a healthy way, but at some point self awareness should kick in and you should know that you're being a gross prick.
Lol he is talking to an openly gay guy. Some people are more aware to not use some words around certain people but he is a bit out of touch and not all that well on his head. He was too insensitive and pretty much throwing shit at everything. No idea if his Army background and whatever he experiencef there has anything to do with that.
 

Ceallach

Smells like fresh rosebuds
The title of their album sleeves me out I Like It When You Sleep, for You Are So Beautiful yet So Unaware of It

The type of dude who would say that I feel is the same dude who would talk about being friend zoned unironically
 
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