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Fake Picture GAF v9 — No Man's Thirst

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T

Transhuman

Unconfirmed Member
Just had my blood drawn. I should become, or start dating, a phlebotomist. Nurses are awesome. They get paid really well and their jobs can't be replaced by robots.

Baymax is not real.
 
yeah so i just checked my snapchat and she had sent me this

gA6pHej.png
 

DrM

Redmond's Baby
Morning. My knee will drive me insane. Couldn't sleep so I spent almost whole night in No Man's Sky, found some really crazy shit and now it is time to go to the doctor
 

Jobbs

Banned
Driving without a phone is scary.

I can remember an era when this was normal, but it's been more than a decade and at that time I was a fearless young man -- brimming with male jelly -- and so it didn't seem to matter.
 

jb1234

Member
Driving without a phone is scary.

I can remember an era when this was normal, but it's been more than a decade and at that time I was a fearless young man -- brimming with male jelly -- and so it didn't seem to matter.

Back in those days, I just kept a large Thomas Guide in the backseat. I kinda miss those days, honestly.
 

Jobbs

Banned
For Jobbsy

The hair color is interesting. I generally don't care a great deal for pigtails on adults. In the above example the hairstyle seems to present kind of a contradiction and it's causing me to feel some tension -- It's very neat and even somewhat overwrought, but the nature of pigtails makes me think of youth and children and being carefree.

If I was going to attempt it I think I'd do it a bit looser. This isn't the perfect example but it's what I found on short notice:

572d94ca34fb185b8abf77015755d086.jpg



Back in those days, I just kept a large Thomas Guide in the backseat. I kinda miss those days, honestly.

When I was like 21 or 22 I drove halfway across the country just using just printed mapquest directions -- Without really caring or feeling intimidated by it at all. I'd be nervous to do that now.

In addition I used to drive fast -- 95 mph+ -- I'm scared of that now. I'm too aware of how one tiny mistake can cost you your face or worse.
 

jb1234

Member
When I was like 21 or 22 I drove halfway across the country just using just printed mapquest directions -- Without really caring or feeling intimidated by it at all. I'd be nervous to do that now.

In addition I used to drive fast -- 95 mph+ -- I'm scared of that now. I'm too aware of how one tiny mistake can cost you your face or worse.

Yeah, best to get that shit out of your system when you're young, haha. It's hard for me to picture you being a reckless driver when you've painted such a vivid picture over the last several months of being a granny behind the wheel.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Back in the day, well before the affordable and nicely updated GPS era, I used to work on the road. All I took with me were prints from the Michelin guide and I didn't even care if my cellphone was dead. I actually hated that my company made me carry that thing.

These days I get panic attacks when Google Maps stops responding for a couple of seconds.
 

Jobbs

Banned
Yeah, best to get that shit out of your system when you're young, haha. It's hard for me to picture you being a reckless driver when you've painted such a vivid picture over the last several months of being a granny behind the wheel.

My first car was a 300zx turbo. It was big, heavy, and powerful (and it had a fabulous 80s sci fi digital dashboard complete with computer woman voice! It was like the car version of Turbo Kid) It had several modifications to unlock the turbo.

What the turbo does is force more air into the combustion chamber -- From the factory there's a wastegate that limits the amount of air that is injected into it. You can install something that bleeds pressure off of the wastegate and makes car go faster. It's a bit dangerous unless you also install other things like an improved air intake, aftermarket exhaust, and installing an intercooler, all of which I did.

I used to drive fast all the time. I was a dumbass.
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
Today was not a good day.

Has Emily lasagna'd her bae yet?
 

jb1234

Member
My first car was a 300zx turbo. It was big, heavy, and powerful (and it had a fabulous 80s sci fi digital dashboard complete with computer woman voice! It was like the car version of Turbo Kid) It had several modifications to unlock the turbo.

What the turbo does is force more air into the combustion chamber -- From the factory there's a wastegate that limits the amount of air that is injected into it. You can install something that bleeds pressure off of the wastegate and makes car go faster. It's a bit dangerous unless you also install other things like an improved air intake, aftermarket exhaust, and installing an intercooler, all of which I did.

I used to drive fast all the time. I was a dumbass.

Way to make global warming worse, Matt. Geez!

For those of you on my fb, that's the boyfriend. He's a cutie.

Oh, he is cute... Can I borrow him for kinky play and general hijinks?
 
I ask Siri how to get to places almost every day, and then I ask her how to get back because I wasn't paying attention. Meanwhile I've never lost my car in a parking lot, and I don't really get lost in video games. There's something fundamentally different about foot travel that makes me understand direction better.



It's an hour after midnight and I'm forcing myself to get some artwork done so I can feel productive. Even just doing one little piece a day is enough to make me feel accomplished, though I usually get far more than that.

I realized tonight that whenever I spend the night with someone it's always at my house, never theirs. And maybe to some that looks hospitable, but it's really just me selfishly loving the comfort of my home and access to my computer and artwork. I realized that because Lucy's in my bed right now when there's no great reason why I shouldn't be back at her place instead, except that I would rather be here. Maybe it's just that I offered first? I don't even remember anymore.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
re: parking lots

I'm so shit at them I always take a picture of my car and the floor/number/color code of the spot before I leave it. Otherwise I may as well call a taxi.

I realized that because Lucy's in my bed right now
I think EatChildren is about to ask you if you made some lasagna.
 

jb1234

Member
I realized tonight that whenever I spend the night with someone it's always at my house, never theirs. And maybe to some that looks hospitable, but it's really just me selfishly loving the comfort of my home and access to my computer and artwork. I realized that because Lucy's in my bed right now when there's no great reason why I shouldn't be back at her place instead, except that I would rather be here. Maybe it's just that I offered first? I don't even remember anymore.

Back when Dude #2 and I were on speaking (and sexy) terms, he very much wanted me to sleep over at his place. I did it once but never felt very comfortable with it. He wanted to snuggle and shit and I just wanted my space. My bed isn't big enough for two people so no one has ever stayed over at my place.

But I wanna use him for kinky play and hijinks D:

I sense conflict in our future. :p
 

Jobbs

Banned
I realized tonight that whenever I spend the night with someone it's always at my house, never theirs. And maybe to some that looks hospitable, but it's really just me selfishly loving the comfort of my home and access to my computer and artwork. I realized that because Lucy's in my bed right now when there's no great reason why I shouldn't be back at her place instead, except that I would rather be here. Maybe it's just that I offered first? I don't even remember anymore.

Exact same. In my case it's probably because I have a house to myself and the last two people I dated had roommates, so it's just the logical choice.

Today I actually shuttled her around so I put some work in, at least.

You weirdos and your facebooking.

My Facebook is a barely visited and even less populated wasteland.

I don't give a shit about Facebook and even find it somewhat creepy. Most people I know use it, including even my mother, and I frequently look on with disdain.
 

A Fish Aficionado

I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
My first car was a 300zx turbo. It was big, heavy, and powerful (and it had a fabulous 80s sci fi digital dashboard complete with computer woman voice! It was like the car version of Turbo Kid) It had several modifications to unlock the turbo.

What the turbo does is force more air into the combustion chamber -- From the factory there's a wastegate that limits the amount of air that is injected into it. You can install something that bleeds pressure off of the wastegate and makes car go faster. It's a bit dangerous unless you also install other things like an improved air intake, aftermarket exhaust, and installing an intercooler, all of which I did.

I used to drive fast all the time. I was a dumbass.
I learned to drive in my brother's rx7.

A modded wastegate is an orgasm.


It's why I like the Nissan Juke. The engine is a throwback to turbo lag engines of old.
 

Jobbs

Banned
I learned to drive in my brother's rx7.

A modded wastegate is an orgasm.


It's why I like the Nissan Juke. The engine is a throwback to turbo lag engines of old.

The distinctive whirr of the turbo was an empowering feeling, yes.

I grew up believing Nissans had the best, most indestructible engines. Some of that was imbued in me from people I respected, but it was also borne out as I watched several of these cars go forever.

For this reason I still have a certain affinity for Nissan/Infiniti to this day, even if I don't own one right now.

I can't tell what I think of the Nissan Juke. It's very distinctive but I can't tell if it's ugly or cool looking.
 
re: parking lots

I'm so shit at them I always take a picture of my car and the floor/number/color code of the spot before I leave it. Otherwise I may as well call a taxi.


I think EatChildren is about to ask you if you made some lasagna.

It feels like most people are that way, or closer to it. I'm always the one leading everyone back to the car, even when I'm not driving.

I don't know how deep the lasagna metaphor is supposed to go. I think by that metric all we did was heat up some red sauce and mozzarella. It's a good blend and tasty, but not very substantial.


Okay but for real, dinner tonight was chips and guacamole. Eight avocados, two cups of salsa, a tablespoon of Sriracha, half a cup of sour cream, a tablespoon of olive oil, lots of minced garlic and fresh-ground pepper, and a whole lemon squeezed in.


Back when Dude #2 and I were on speaking (and sexy) terms, he very much wanted me to sleep over at his place. I did it once but never felt very comfortable with it. He wanted to snuggle and shit and I just wanted my space. My bed isn't big enough for two people so no one has ever stayed over at my place.

How would you rectify that had the relationship continued? That seems like a no-win situation for you.


Exact same. In my case it's probably because I have a house to myself and the last two people I dated had roommates, so it's just the logical choice.

Today I actually shuttled her around so I put some work in, at least.

I have roommates but she has parents, so I suppose that trumps the other. Her parents are really nice and dote on us though, so maybe not.
 

jb1234

Member
How would you rectify that had the relationship continued? That seems like a no-win situation for you.

It's hard to say. I was never particularly attracted to the dude and it took me forever to finally figure that out because I really didn't know what I was feeling. Part of me was resisting him because sleeping over sounded more relationshippy than I wanted.

As an epilogue to this story, we didn't speak for the month after the great Pride incident where he lectured me for being a buzzkill. I finally heard from him a week ago, he asked what's been up. I said not much and asked what he's been up to. He never responded. E finito and all that.

(Well, okay. We did speak briefly in that month. He texted, asking what I was doing. I sent him a picture of a chili I was making. He pouted, saying he was hoping for cock. I rolled my eyes and never bothered to reply. I mean, come on, dude.)

For future sexual escapes with dudes, I'm planning on getting a bigger bed.
 

Jobbs

Banned
I have roommates but she has parents, so I suppose that trumps the other. Her parents are really nice and dote on us though, so maybe not.

Always seems weird doing anything with someone's parents around, though. Maybe I'm just old/old fashioned...

I also first met Erica when she showed up at my house, so I guess just being in my house is a natural thing.

I've been inside her apartment exactly once. I liked her cat. I had mixed feelings about the room mate, but that might be because I view her as the thing that I'm competing against (and she probably views me the same). They've known eachother forever.
 
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