Eh, I find the humor amusing. I just don't really feel the need to post about it.
That's good, at least you do find it funny.
We've all made these lists before, I'm sure, but eh, why not one more time...
Movies/OVAs
Will watch (eventually): Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha The Movie 2nd A's, Milky Holmes OVA
Might watch: Fairy Tail movie, Ruroni Kenshin movie
TV
Will watch: Yuru Yuri 2 (most promising show of the season, probably); Dog Days' (the first season was uneven, but hopefully this is more of the good than the bad)
Will try: Dakara Boku wa, H ga Dekinai; Oda Nobuna no Yabou, Kokoro Connect (if it's good, this could certainly go up a category)
Maybe try: Chouyaku Hyakunin Isshu: Uta Koi; Koi to Senkyo to Chocolate; Binbougami Ga! (don't love the manga, but might give it a try); Kono Naka ni Hitori, Imouto ga Iru! (morbid curiosity, mostly); Ebiten (looks bad); Hagure Yuusha no Estetica; La Storia della Arcana Familia; Aruvu Rezuru; Campione (these last ones don't sound good, but they're not started yet, so who knows for sure)
Will definitely not watch: Sword Art Online, Chitose Get You
As for Horizon II, I'll consider watching it if I can get myself to watch the second half of the first season, which I abandoned midway through.