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[Incendiary]

Use them all, dude. Stop fretting and start dating.

I'm more hesitant about OKC because the search options on there let me be super picky and I end up not messaging women because of arbitrary criteria like a single question they answered that I don't agree with. It's stupid, but apps like Tinder are better for me because it forces me to just say "fuck it" and talk to people I match with.

Hint: a lot are lying.

Tinder is socially acceptable, but writing 'just looking for a hook-up, nothing more' is not - where I am at least. Same goes for messaging etiquette - lots of people won't give off that you'll get lucky on the first date, but they'll come back to yours after meeting for that first coffee.

Yeah, I'm guessing most girls don't want to advertise "just on here because I'm looking to go to Bone Town, USA with a few guys" but on the other hand, most of the ones I've actually matched with/had conversations with were looking for more serious stuff.

When you say people on Tinder are looking for serious relationships, have you actually been on dates or are you going by what they say in their initial messages/their profile?

Worth keeping in mind that not everyone wants to advertise they only want casual sex and would rather go with something safer like I'm looking for a serious relationship in case they meet someone and there's no connection/they've been catfished or they don't want to have sex that day. It's about trying to make sure there's no expectations going into a date.

Just talk to people, set up dates and see how it goes.

I'm talking about the ones I've been on dates with, mostly. I did match with a 21 year old who wanted to meet and get wasted after work during the middle of the week, which probably would have led to some fun - but she was already acting super clingy before we even met and I just had a bad gut feeling about the whole situation so I had to decline that one.

 

[ZackieChan]

I'm more hesitant about OKC because the search options on there let me be super picky and I end up not messaging women because of arbitrary criteria like a single question they answered that I don't agree with. It's stupid, but apps like Tinder are better for me because it forces me to just say "fuck it" and talk to people I match with.

So you're fully aware of the problem. Now fix it or force yourself to not be so picky. You are in control, man.

 

[names2hard4you]

So I got a girls number and now I'm flaking on texting her. Cause I am an idiot. She is obviously interested enough that she gives you her number. But that little nagging negative voice is in the back of you head is there. So Gaf how do you quiet the negativity and send out the first text or call?

You Just do it™.

 

[Roufianos]

What do you guys reckon makes a better main pic on Tinder, a clear selfie of your face or a pic of you living life?

 

[Roufianos]

Parts of this sounds awfully familiar for me.

I think most girls on Tinder are just looking for some good dick. I think they're just as shallow as people generally make guys out to be.

I'm just getting fucking tired of this shit. That was the eigrh girl I've met off there in the last year.

Sometimes it's been because we just haven't connected but a good few times it's been because they were bat shit crazy about relationships or just wanted to fuck.

I've trained myself not to be so optimistic and expectant recently but I got on so well with this girl that I kind of got my hopes up.

 

[neoanarch]

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. Honestly that wasn't so much a "what should I do" and more "what do you do"


But I did need to hear some of that.

Not directly as in, we matched, talked, ran into eachother coïncidentally while drunk and banged.

It never goes anywher" 'cause I don't initiate conversation. I'm planning to ofc., hence the question. Should've made that clear.

If you go into the conversation with the intention of getting laid I think it'll work out for you. If you matched you're already most of the way there. It's all about leading the conversation into that direction. Maybe before since you weren't looking for hookups you missed a perfect hint or failed to give one.

 

[Messofanego]

I don't think I could ever say the italicized to another human being without including a whole crock of bullshit. I've danced around every problem I've ever had in life. The idea of just telling someone something like that scares me more than just going along with it. I guess I'll just have to think of something.

You're not going to die. Just pull the band aid, be honest. You'll be grateful instead of pussy footing for ages.

 

[Sickboy007]

I had a second date with my crush, we ended up smooching in front of the sunset and walking hand in hand like we had known each other for months. Will post marriage pics.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Just had a brief conversation with the girl I was dating. We agreed that things weren't progressing and, after sharing our feelings like adults, decided to be friends instead due to a commonality of interests and caring about each other.

A year ago, I would've made up excuses or something. It's good to actually articulate how you're feeling and accept the consequences.

But I gotta say, my interest in dating is truly waning for some reason.

 

[direct_quote]

So my girlfriend broke up with me recently, feels bad. Said I wasn't being open enough to her.. So I probably will try to move on, but I guess I should ask you guys this.. Has anyone here have success with getting an ex back? Was it worth it?

 

[War Peaceman]

Not directly as in, we matched, talked, ran into eachother coïncidentally while drunk and banged.

It never goes anywhere 'cause I don't initiate conversation. I'm planning to ofc., hence the question. Should've made that clear.

Yeah, I get that it is sometimes difficult to start up a conversation but it is a problem where the only possible solution is to actually do it. There is no advice to give. She's already seen your penis, a text can't be a bigger ordeal than that.

Ahhhhh there was another page. damn lol

 

[ZackieChan]

Just had a brief conversation with the girl I was dating. We agreed that things weren't progressing and, after sharing our feelings like adults, decided to be friends instead due to a commonality of interests and caring about each other.

A year ago, I would've made up excuses or something. It's good to actually articulate how you're feeling and accept the consequences.

But I gotta say, my interest in dating is truly waning for some reason.

You're not buying dresses, so it's a step forward. It's ok to take a little break!

 

[TeddyBoy]

Hello GAF! I'm actually not here in dating advice but just some advice on women in general. I'm normally fairly decent with reading what women are saying behind what they're actually saying but one of friends yesterday asked me: "Teddy, can you be my gay best friend?"

Now as someone who is not gay but more camp than your regular straight person I'm not sure how to take this. She does have something for me since she says (when drunk) that she wishes her boyfriend was more like me and she gave me a kiss last time we were out and she tried we met up yesterday (I actually rejected her :lol).

So yeah, if anyone can translate this for me that would be great

 

[EchoChamber]

Hello GAF! I'm actually not here in dating advice but just some advice on women in general. I'm normally fairly decent with reading what women are saying behind what they're actually saying but one of friends yesterday asked me: "Teddy, can you be my gay best friend?"

Now as someone who is not gay but more camp than your regular straight person I'm not sure how to take this. She does have something for me since she says (when drunk) that she wishes her boyfriend was more like me and she gave me a kiss last time we were out and she tried we met up yesterday (I actually rejected her :lol).

So yeah, if anyone can translate this for me that would be great

She want to do boyfriend stuff without sex with you, I think lol.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

You're not buying dresses, so it's a step forward. It's ok to take a little break!

You inspired me to do that! Also, seeing my buddy and his bride in China made me realize that I'm not going to waste time forcing things.

I'm starting a new job on October 3 in downtown DC, and I just dropped like 3k on a whole new wardrobe, which has me feeling incredibly confident. (Had to -- for the past 8 years, I've worn a military uniform to work, so I had nothing.)

Hello GAF! I'm actually not here in dating advice but just some advice on women in general. I'm normally fairly decent with reading what women are saying behind what they're actually saying but one of friends yesterday asked me: "Teddy, can you be my gay best friend?"

Now as someone who is not gay but more camp than your regular straight person I'm not sure how to take this. She does have something for me since she says (when drunk) that she wishes her boyfriend was more like me and she gave me a kiss last time we were out and she tried we met up yesterday (I actually rejected her :lol).

So yeah, if anyone can translate this for me that would be great

You're her nonthreatening friend that she might flirt with a little, but there's also a chance you're misinterpreting it. What do you mean by "giving you a kiss"? That's so vague it could go several ways.

 

[MogCakes]

So yeah, if anyone can translate this for me that would be great

One of my closest friends is a woman and she has never proposed that I be her gay best friend with a flirty undertone, when we meet up we just hang out.

 

[gaiages]

What do you guys reckon makes a better main pic on Tinder, a clear selfie of your face or a pic of you living life?

The second, but of course have both of them, so they can see how you... actually look.

Unless a pic of you living life has multiple people, then the selfie. Don't wanna confuse someone with which person you actually are with the first pic.

Just had a brief conversation with the girl I was dating. We agreed that things weren't progressing and, after sharing our feelings like adults, decided to be friends instead due to a commonality of interests and caring about each other.

A year ago, I would've made up excuses or something. It's good to actually articulate how you're feeling and accept the consequences.

But I gotta say, my interest in dating is truly waning for some reason.

Hey, if you don't feel like it, you don't feel like it, no need to force yourself ;3

So my girlfriend broke up with me recently, feels bad. Said I wasn't being open enough to her.. So I probably will try to move on, but I guess I should ask you guys this.. Has anyone here have success with getting an ex back? Was it worth it?

I'm sure it's worked for some people, but generally you two broke up for a reason (or reasons), and those reasons often don't just go away, even if you *both* (most important word) are working on them. 9 times out of 10, best to move on and not drag out a failed relationship.

Hello GAF! I'm actually not here in dating advice but just some advice on women in general. I'm normally fairly decent with reading what women are saying behind what they're actually saying but one of friends yesterday asked me: "Teddy, can you be my gay best friend?"

Now as someone who is not gay but more camp than your regular straight person I'm not sure how to take this. She does have something for me since she says (when drunk) that she wishes her boyfriend was more like me and she gave me a kiss last time we were out and she tried we met up yesterday (I actually rejected her :lol).

So yeah, if anyone can translate this for me that would be great

"I want to talk to you about my feelings and friends and shitty boy toys and go shopping with you but I don't want to have sex with you"

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

Wooo! Met a girl in person couple weeks ago at a bar on opening football season! 10 years younger than me (24), but smart and attractive. Everything is greet until last night....

I'm out with friends. She texts me come to the area she's at. I convince my friends to go there. We meet. Super crowded and loud. We hug and kiss. She tells me she'll be outside with her gfs. I go out there. Her friends have been drinking. They act rude to me, telling me she's not interested and leave. I told them I know her and we've been on a date. I leave. The girl is just embarrassed. She texts me saying she's so sorry and didn't know they'd do it.

I'm with my friends there. She texts me saying she's inside. I go in. We're dancing, grinding, and one of her friends is warming up to me. We continue to dance and kiss. She said were not having sex tonight. I said ok, fine. She says look into my eyes, we're not having sex tonight. I looked into her eyes, and told her ok, fine, being serious. Then I say you wanted to see me, and we're having fun. It's near closing time, she says her and her friend need to use the bathroom and they'll be back. They don't come back. I text her it's closing time and we're leaving (my friends).

Now she has 'read' on in her iPhone. I shoot her a text today, and it just says delivered. She didn't read it, so that leaves me to believe she blocked me. Not even the last text from the bar she didnt read.

Either she got spooked or her friends talked her out of seeing me? If it's the former, we were hot n heavy with the grinding and kissing. Maybe she thought I was still trying to he into her pants. What's funny is we were texting back and forth when I was with my friends (before she told me to see her), and she said traps are good for one thing, and you'll know in a few more dates. Traps as in my muscles. So definitely and eventually wanted to have sex.

Fuck. Oh well.

 

[ZackieChan]

What the hell are traps good for?

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

Lol I don't know. I asked my friend and he said grabbing onto them while she's riding me on top?

I shouldn't have seen her. I should've stuck with my friends while she was with her friends

 

[Salamando]

What the hell are traps good for?

Shrugging. In JU's case, shrugging in confusion as yet another girl ends things for reasons he just don't understand.

 

[anaslexy]

Hi GAF, I feel like I'm in a fix. I started seeing this girl six weeks ago and we are at a point where we are enjoying each others company and the sex is great. She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go. She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

edit-nm. Time to move on to the next instead over analyzing what happened.

 

[Salamando]

edit-nm. Time to move on to the next instead over analyzing what happened.

Doing a post-mortem on a relationship that didn't work out is healthy. Overanalyzing stuff isn't. In this case...

- You're still weird with texting. Noticing that messages are "read" or "unread, yet delivered" is a big part of your overthinking.
- You've been on one date, if I read that properly. At that point, ghosting is normal, and people will end things for any reason at all (sometimes no reason). Best you can do is try to remember obvious fuck-ups.
- "Well, fine" is a shitty response to a girl telling you "we're not having sex tonight". That she had to reiterate it indicates (to me, at least) that she didn't like your first answer.
- It's been less than 24 hours. Not saying the lack of texts is a good thing, but give it time before you get mopey.

 

[MogCakes]

There is only one constant for ghosting, and it is lack of interest. Most people just aren't interested in anyone that doesn't fit a specific criteria, even if they give you a date. Take it in stride, your success is pretty good so far.

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

Yeah. I guess it does happen as you say. Everything can go fine one minute then the next completely disinterested. First date last week was great. Thought I looked great and always complimented me. As I said she texted me telling me to come to the place she's at, and she wanted to see me.

I mean really. If I didn't see her last night we would've gone out next week, and none of this would've happened. She was being proactive by saying she'd love to see me next week, and if I was free. Even sent me a text of
her trying on a new outfit, and she was going to wear it in our second date.

Edit-thinking the shitty response was my downfall. I was legit shocked this 9/10 girl was interested in me. Our first date last week i was expecting her to cancel, but she went the whole nine yards. Ended up making out in her car and day later saying how great of a kisser I am.

Future reference what could've I said?

 

[Max]

Future reference what could've I said?

"Sure we aren't "

 

[gaiages]

Hi GAF, I feel like I'm in a fix. I started seeing this girl six weeks ago and we are at a point where we are enjoying each others company and the sex is great. She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go. She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

I'm.... Not sure I follow. You asked her if she wanted to go on a trip with you. She decides she wants to and pay her own way. Her wanting to go with you is bad... how? Unless you actually didn't want her to go (in that case why did you ask?) I really don't get what she did wrong here.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I'm.... Not sure I follow. You asked her if she wanted to go on a trip with you. She decides she wants to and pay her own way. Her wanting to go with you is bad... how? Unless you actually didn't want her to go (in that case why did you ask?) I really don't get what she did wrong here.

Seems he's taking her acceptance of his offer as her being too clingy/eager, which is ridiculous in the extreme.

Why the fuck did you make the offer? You didn't want to talk about where the relationship is going but you thought it would be a good idea to invite her on a trip where you'll both spend lots of time together and now you're upset she accepted?

Jesus Christ.

And yes, there is a way out. Give her the money she spent on the holiday and break up with her. Spare her from any more of your nonsense.

 

[Sickboy007]

Hi GAF, I feel like I'm in a fix. I started seeing this girl six weeks ago and we are at a point where we are enjoying each others company and the sex is great. She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go. She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

If you're really feeling guilty about the money, you can still treat her right while you're overseas. If it's her eagerness to do what you suggested that's making you uncomfortable...I don't really know what to say, you should probably break up with her.

 

[Spinluck]

I'll never understand some of JU's situations.

They sound so absurd.

 

[Jason's Ultimatum]

I'll never understand some of JU's situations.

They sound so absurd.

Well what was I supposed to say? What Max said? It seems like I would've taken a gamble if I said sure we weren't. Either that would've made her mad or the opposite. She also brought up her living situation with her roommate (could've been a clue), and at one point how her friends are just protecting her from being hurt again, which I'm assuming an ex.

 

[direct_quote]

I'm sure it's worked for some people, but generally you two broke up for a reason (or reasons), and those reasons often don't just go away, even if you *both* (most important word) are working on them. 9 times out of 10, best to move on and not drag out a failed relationship.

Seems like the most obvious/right answer is to walk away.... But I'd at least like to reach out once more (i have to give back some of her stuff) and if she doesn't seem open to me or the idea I'll just have to move on... Shit sucks....

Then I guess it's back to the online dating grind.. sigh...

 

[Gotdatmoney]

She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

After 6 weeks you can't answer "where are we going" without a bullshit none answer?

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go.

What the fuck? Why do you ask someone to go on a ttip with you that you aren't even committed to? Why did you give her flight details if you haven't booked yourself?

She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

To be clear nothing you have said in this post describes someone as eager. You invited her on a trip and she took you up. She asked if this was going anywhere after a month and a half and you gave none answers.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

Figure out what you actually want?

 

[Sickboy007]

How soon is too soon for a relationship talk anyway, without sounding like I want to wear her skin? After 4-5 weeks you should be in the clear imho.

 

[Spinluck]

Well what was I supposed to say? What Max said? It seems like I would've taken a gamble if I said sure we weren't. Either that would've made her mad or the opposite. She also brought up her living situation with her roommate (could've been a clue), and at one point how her friends are just protecting her from being hurt again, which I'm assuming an ex.

I just meant for as many times things like this have happened to you, I thought that you'd sort of learn from it or pick up on certain things.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I'm hungry, are you hungry?
I could eat, what do you want for lunch?
Goddamn, you're too clingy. What the fuck.

 

[names2hard4you]

Got a date setup for Tuesday. She is a model and works in a law firm. I am gonna meet her at her firm after she is done. Rather than setting up an actual location to go to from there, we are gonna take a stroll and find a coffee shop. She seems very loving and sweet. Let's see how it goes.

 

[Mahonay]

How soon is too soon for a relationship talk anyway, without sounding like I want to wear her skin? After 4-5 weeks you should be in the clear imho.

Yeah I'd say a month is about the earliest.

Got a date setup for Tuesday. She is a model and works in a law firm. I am gonna meet her at her firm after she is done. Rather than setting up an actual location to go to from there, we are gonna take a stroll and find a coffee shop. She seems very loving and sweet. Let's see how it goes.

Sounds like you've got it set up pretty well. Good luck.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Got a date setup for Tuesday. She is a model and works in a law firm. I am gonna meet her at her firm after she is done. Rather than setting up an actual location to go to from there, we are gonna take a stroll and find a coffee shop. She seems very loving and sweet. Let's see how it goes.

Good luck, although it might be worth looking up a few places in the general area, especially as it's after work. She might have a stressful day and lots of wondering around might be the last thing she wants to do.

 

[Mahonay]

Good luck, although it might be worth looking up a few places in the general area, especially as it's after work. She might have a stressful day and lots of wondering around might be the last thing she wants to do.

I mean coffee shops usually aren't hard to find. Could always just pop into the first one they find if she's not into taking a walk.

 

[names2hard4you]

Sounds like you've got it set up pretty well. Good luck.

Good luck, although it might be worth looking up a few places in the general area, especially as it's after work. She might have a stressful day and lots of wondering around might be the last thing she wants to do.

I mean coffee shops usually aren't hard to find. Could always just pop into the first one they find if she's not into taking a walk.

Yeah I was thinking of doing that, get a general overview of the area, just so we don't settle for the first thing we find if there's something with a better "vibe". She seems very humble, and loving but still. A girl as beautiful as she is deserves a little more work on my part.

 

[gwailo]

I just meant for as many times things like this have happened to you, I thought that you'd sort of learn from it or pick up on certain things.

Now you realize why most of us have given up trying to help him out. Same bullshit over and over again.

 

[ZackieChan]

Well what was I supposed to say? What Max said? It seems like I would've taken a gamble if I said sure we weren't. Either that would've made her mad or the opposite. She also brought up her living situation with her roommate (could've been a clue), and at one point how her friends are just protecting her from being hurt again, which I'm assuming an ex.

I feel like the issue is never that you said or did one thing wrong, as you seem to think. This is a repeating pattern, so there is a wider issue at play, I think. Why do roommates always tell the girl not to date you, for instance? Do you come off as a player or something?

If you're really feeling guilty about the money, you can still treat her right while you're overseas. If it's her eagerness to do what you suggested that's making you uncomfortable...I don't really know what to say, you should probably break up with her.

The whole post was ridiculous.

Yeah I was thinking of doing that, get a general overview of the area, just so we don't settle for the first thing we find if there's something with a better "vibe". She seems very humble, and loving but still. A girl as beautiful as she is deserves a little more work on my part.

I'd say this is a rookie move and a bad way to think. You gotta play it cool, homey. Don't get all tripped up because she's beautiful - that'll shine through in your intersections, I think.

 

[Salamando]

Edit-thinking the shitty response was my downfall. I was legit shocked this 9/10 girl was interested in me. Our first date last week i was expecting her to cancel, but she went the whole nine yards. Ended up making out in her car and day later saying how great of a kisser I am.

Future reference what could've I said?

I usually just say something like "If that's what you want, I won't press it any further. Now, let's get back to X!" Not the greatest response, but far less dismissive than a "yeah, fine".

I mean really. If I didn't see her last night we would've gone out next week, and none of this would've happened. She was being proactive by saying she'd love to see me next week, and if I was free. Even sent me a text of
her trying on a new outfit, and she was going to wear it in our second date.

That's the kind of post-date thinking that's toxic. The night happened. If there's something you can learn from it, try to find it, but otherwise move on.

Why didn't you already have a second date scheduled?

The other thing that sticks me as odd - you're hanging out with your friends, she texts you to come over to her, and you uproot your friends and go over to her...feels like the healthy thing to do is tell her "no", that you're hanging out with your friends, and you'll see her <insert day of second date here>.

 

[Rembrandt]

Hi GAF, I feel like I'm in a fix. I started seeing this girl six weeks ago and we are at a point where we are enjoying each others company and the sex is great. She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go. She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

lmao, i feel bad for her.

 

[Condom]

Hi GAF, I feel like I'm in a fix. I started seeing this girl six weeks ago and we are at a point where we are enjoying each others company and the sex is great. She asked me where are we going and I said lets not think about that and enjoy each other's company for now.

I asked her casually to join me on a trip overseas and she said she'll think about it. She asked me for my trip and flight details and to my surprise, she had bought her ticket few days after. I was a bit surprised and now I feel like I should go on the trip myself because I didn't expect her to go. She is a student and said she spent some of her savings to go on this trip with me. I feel guilty as part of it is my fault but I've also lost a bit of attraction for her due to her eagerness. Part of the guilt is that she is a student and has spent some of her savings for this ticket.

Is there a way to get out of this pickle?

You're really weird man. Enjoy life instead of playing games with both yourself and others. Go on the trip with her.

 

[War Peaceman]

Got a date setup for Tuesday. She is a model and works in a law firm. I am gonna meet her at her firm after she is done. Rather than setting up an actual location to go to from there, we are gonna take a stroll and find a coffee shop. She seems very loving and sweet. Let's see how it goes.

I think the spontaneous 'let's meet and go somewhere cool' can be a really nice set up for a date. Even if it isn't really spontaneous. Good luck!

 

[Exokell]

Yeah. I guess it does happen as you say. Everything can go fine one minute then the next completely disinterested. First date last week was great. Thought I looked great and always complimented me. As I said she texted me telling me to come to the place she's at, and she wanted to see me.

I mean really. If I didn't see her last night we would've gone out next week, and none of this would've happened. She was being proactive by saying she'd love to see me next week, and if I was free. Even sent me a text of
her trying on a new outfit, and she was going to wear it in our second date.

Edit-thinking the shitty response was my downfall. I was legit shocked this 9/10 girl was interested in me. Our first date last week i was expecting her to cancel, but she went the whole nine yards. Ended up making out in her car and day later saying how great of a kisser I am.

Future reference what could've I said?

Dude I think youre just too full of yourself. All of your posts, you always talk about how great looking you are or how great of a kisser you are. It's not all about looks, you gotta have personality. Hopefully you got a sense of humor and random. Anyway this girl told you she didn't want to have sex and you responded like you didn't care.

 

[TeddyBoy]

She want to do boyfriend stuff without sex with you, I think lol.

One of my closest friends is a woman and she has never proposed that I be her gay best friend with a flirty undertone, when we meet up we just hang out.

"I want to talk to you about my feelings and friends and shitty boy toys and go shopping with you but I don't want to have sex with you"

Thanks guys! She's a terrible friend so in that case I'll just stop hanging out with her :lol

You're her nonthreatening friend that she might flirt with a little, but there's also a chance you're misinterpreting it. What do you mean by "giving you a kiss"? That's so vague it could go several ways.

In a nightclub she pulled my chin down and gave me a peck on the lips and another time she pulled my face down holding both my cheeks towards her lips (I hesitated so we didn't kiss).