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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
- Start date
- Status
Will the Thrill
Banned
I have the same problem where I focus on one person more than I should and a couple others just dissipate in interest. I've been doing better more recently though. I just try to think of it like "Well obviously she is probably doing that as well so it's no issue anyway".
The Power Of Snap
Member
Update on this story:
So i went on a date and it all went well (kiss and slept at her place etc..) but she told me she wants to move very slowly and make things right going forward.
I'm not really used to that to be honest and i'm ok with it (i think she's worth it). But my feeling is that she's testing me. She's from Mexico....
ZackieChan
Member
she was swiping from INSIDE THE HOUSE
?????? How is her being from Mexico important in this story
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
I'm guessing that he implied she was from a "traditional" culture, which explains the "moving slowly" aspect of things, irrespective of the fact that plenty of people don't fuck on the first date.
Or else he's afraid the Wall will keep them apart, thus he needs to move quickly.
The Power Of Snap
Member
I've heard/read that girls from mx/south america takes multiple dates before having a relationship.
My goal is not to fuck on the first dates anyways, it's never worth it in the end 99.9% of the times. I don't want to be offensive sorry....
The Power Of Snap
Member
I can't compare, i'm just basing it on a personal level and i can see from the replies i'm super wrong...
Just...to hell with the entire "she's testing you" aspect. If she says she wants to take it slow, take it slow. If she really wanted you to take it fast after telling you she wants to take it slow, that's trouble you don't need in a relationship. Honesty > hotness. Both is better though.
The Power Of Snap
Member
Yeah that's what i'm going to do, thanks! I think i really over analyzed big time.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Bigly overanalyzing things is like 98% of this thread. Be present and comfortable with the person you're present and comfortable with. That's like, the secret of dating.
Ray Wonder
Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
I've never heard of a one date, then relationship thing. Lol. I feel like you need grilled a bit more for that 😂
I'm going to give it a few days and then ask if she'd like to go for a 2nd date - something more of a day out, have a proper sit down meal maybe as well. We both work full time in city jobs so I understand how a working week can feel when your day starts at 6am and ends at 7pm! And two dates within the same 7 day week might be overkill in that situation!
ZackieChan
Member
By yourself?
How about some more details on the date? What went wrong?
Shall I make a list? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )
Bruce Springsteen
Member
I can confirm that this is bullshit
Met a Colombian girl outside the local post office earlier this year, we were having sex that afternoon and she got way too attached
names2hard4you
Member
Wrong.
I'm dating a Brazilian girl, we are exclusive and established as much fairly early on.
Had the weirdest thing happen. Last Saturday a girl I met on Tinder weeks ago asked me out for a drink. We were planning on doing it a couple of weeks ago but didn't happen. Didn't talk for three weeks or so, and all of the sudden she asks me for a drink. I was free, so we went. All is good, had fun.
Yesterday she asks me what I'm doing today, asks me if I want to go for another drink today. I'm like 'sure, sounds like fun!' Her reply: 'Great! But I have to tell you I have a boyfriend back home, so I can only offer friendship' (we both live abroad).
My reply:
I mean, I don't mind being just friends with women, even when I meet them on Tinder, but damn, girl, tell me this before our first date so I know what kind of expectations I should have.
So I told her 'yeahhh, let's not do drinks this week then, maybe some other time'.
(for people that say I should've asked her for the second drink, I was actually planning on doing that after I finished work, but she got the drop on me)
Just sharing a weird story, no real other reason than to just vent
Yesterday she asks me what I'm doing today, asks me if I want to go for another drink today. I'm like 'sure, sounds like fun!' Her reply: 'Great! But I have to tell you I have a boyfriend back home, so I can only offer friendship' (we both live abroad).
My reply:
I mean, I don't mind being just friends with women, even when I meet them on Tinder, but damn, girl, tell me this before our first date so I know what kind of expectations I should have.
So I told her 'yeahhh, let's not do drinks this week then, maybe some other time'.
(for people that say I should've asked her for the second drink, I was actually planning on doing that after I finished work, but she got the drop on me)
Just sharing a weird story, no real other reason than to just vent
artsi
Member
Yeaaah I should do that more but I've also been in a situation where I had to choose between two girls and... that also sucked ass, just can't win lol.
Messofanego
Banned
Had the weirdest thing happen. Last Saturday a girl I met on Tinder weeks ago asked me out for a drink. We were planning on doing it a couple of weeks ago but didn't happen. Didn't talk for three weeks or so, and all of the sudden she asks me for a drink. I was free, so we went. All is good, had fun.
Yesterday she asks me what I'm doing today, asks me if I want to go for another drink today. I'm like 'sure, sounds like fun!' Her reply: 'Great! But I have to tell you I have a boyfriend back home, so I can only offer friendship' (we both live abroad).
My reply:
I mean, I don't mind being just friends with women, even when I meet them on Tinder, but damn, girl, tell me this before our first date so I know what kind of expectations I should have.
So I told her 'yeahhh, let's not do drinks this week then, maybe some other time'.
(for people that say I should've asked her for the second drink, I was actually planning on doing that after I finished work, but she got the drop on me)
Just sharing a weird story, no real other reason than to just vent
stn
Member
There's this girl I know that has been asking me to buy her dinner for, not kidding, at least a year now. Its gotten so consistent that I don't think anything I say will get the point across that I just see her as a friend. She's really good looking (she models, for what that's worth) and has plenty of suitors I'm sure. Ironically enough I'm not into her because she's way too obsessed with herself, doesn't like animals, etc...
I'm actually comfortable with keeping things status quo, I'm just wondering if there's something else I can do?
I'm actually comfortable with keeping things status quo, I'm just wondering if there's something else I can do?
Messofanego
Banned
Don't overthink it! If a girl drops you for contacting her the day after instead of three days later (or vice versa), you're not losing out on anything.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
Anytime between "instantly" and "eternity".
lunchtoast
Member
Have a date tonight. Girl messaged me on Tinder Monday night and we scheduled drinks for tonight. Should have scheduled earlier because it felt like two days of awkward conversation and loss of interest, plus you don't want to talk too much and save it for the date. She also mentioned earlier today she's feeling sleepy, which sounds like she might cancel.
Also she's from Brazil and just visiting families she used to au pair, and doesn't have a car so not really feeling it anyways.
Also she's from Brazil and just visiting families she used to au pair, and doesn't have a car so not really feeling it anyways.
LucidMomentum
Member
How does one stop being so thirsty?
Flirting with people I know aren't interested is just so much easier than trying to meet people to eventually add to that list of people I know aren't interested.
Flirting with people I know aren't interested is just so much easier than trying to meet people to eventually add to that list of people I know aren't interested.
stn
Member
Not directly like that (I'm a stupid idiot, I know). I did say I'm not really looking to date, I figured she'd get the hint.
She tends to become more aggressive and persistent when I friend-zone or sister-zone.
This. This is the right answer.
ZackieChan
Member
Baki
Member
So my ex / first love / ex-fiance is getting married.
Its been 2.5 years since we broke up and I'm not sure how I feel about this. I haven't had a serious relationship since we broke up (longest I've done afterwards is 2 months). This is partially because I'm highly career focused at the moment & travelling for work all the time. I'm also finding it difficult to try stuff like online dating because I think my height hurts me here 🤔
But yeah...just thought GAF could be a nice place to dump my thoughts.
Tl; dr: ex-fiance getting married and I'm still stuck on first dates 😂
Its been 2.5 years since we broke up and I'm not sure how I feel about this. I haven't had a serious relationship since we broke up (longest I've done afterwards is 2 months). This is partially because I'm highly career focused at the moment & travelling for work all the time. I'm also finding it difficult to try stuff like online dating because I think my height hurts me here 🤔
But yeah...just thought GAF could be a nice place to dump my thoughts.
Tl; dr: ex-fiance getting married and I'm still stuck on first dates 😂
You go drink a drink of water to cool off bruh
Basic hydration rules geez
So my ex / first love / ex-fiance is getting married.
Its been 2.5 years since we broke up and I'm not sure how I feel about this. I haven't had a serious relationship since we broke up (longest I've done afterwards is 2 months). This is partially because I'm highly career focused at the moment & travelling for work all the time. I'm also finding it difficult to try stuff like online dating because I think my height hurts me here 🤔
But yeah...just thought GAF could be a nice place to dump my thoughts.
Tl; dr: ex-fiance getting married and I'm still stuck on first dates 😂
1. How tall are you?
2. Who cares? It wasn't some kind of race to see who could get married first or whatever
direct_quote
Member
But what if you're older and everyone you know is married but you (older than 30).... I feel like I'm lagging behind everyone because I started my career later and didn't want to get into anything serious until my shit was together financially... Kind of regret that now.
names2hard4you
Member
So my ex / first love / ex-fiance is getting married.
Its been 2.5 years since we broke up and I'm not sure how I feel about this. I haven't had a serious relationship since we broke up (longest I've done afterwards is 2 months). This is partially because I'm highly career focused at the moment & travelling for work all the time. I'm also finding it difficult to try stuff like online dating because I think my height hurts me here 🤔
But yeah...just thought GAF could be a nice place to dump my thoughts.
Tl; dr: ex-fiance getting married and I'm still stuck on first dates 😂
Think of it this way: she's one step closer to divorce than you are. You are welcome, now carry on happily living your life.
Count Dookkake
Member
To answer your question, have a wank.
As for the rest, you have accidentally stumbled across one of the best ways to improve your skills. Flirting when it doesn't matter is a great opportunity to practice for when it does matter. Be charming as often as you can. It doesn't cost anything and it will eventually pay off.
This is why I don't like "hints" very much. Just tell her directly but nicely that you don't see her that way. You don't have to be 100% honest, but giving some answer like that will just give her false hope that she can change your mind (and I have been on the other end of this before when not getting the girl's hints).
Today I went out and not the best, but improvement for the next time, would be better going out with people from friends to a girlfriend. Don't have either, friends that I keep in touch don't go out, so they wouldn't go.
It was nice seeing people around the same age as me out in the night, only at school do I see that as I work mostly with older people. Going to ask coworkers about hanging out at bars and such.
It was nice seeing people around the same age as me out in the night, only at school do I see that as I work mostly with older people. Going to ask coworkers about hanging out at bars and such.
Baki
Member
1/ 5ft6
I am getting dates though. But definitely feel like the height is a bit of a barrier.
Not the end of the world though & not much I can do about it.
2/ Agreed. I guess I still had some feelings for her & our breakup had more to do with where we were in our lives rather than fundamental issues. I think subconsciously I had hoped we'd run into each other again.
Hahah.
I had the 2nd date with that American girl last night and it really feels like things are moving faster than I initially anticipated.
She did say she was forward with her intentions, but it still took me by surprise. This could be partially down to the fact she's American though, since most girls I meet are typically more reserved with their feelings.
I can only imagine she wants something more short-term since she's only here for a year, so that also suits what I want right now.
She did say she was forward with her intentions, but it still took me by surprise. This could be partially down to the fact she's American though, since most girls I meet are typically more reserved with their feelings.
I can only imagine she wants something more short-term since she's only here for a year, so that also suits what I want right now.
names2hard4you
Member
1) Bruh I am fucking shorter than you, at 5'5" and don't have any problems. I've dated taller and shorter girls, but it never got in the way. You are 5'6", which is kind of average. No excuses.
2) This seems to be the real issue holding you back. Be true to yourself, and let go. Specially after 2.5 years. She moved on, so can you.
EDIT: My post sounds harsh as heck. But honestly I think sometimes one needs something like this to snap back into shape. Heck I know I wish I had someone tell me stuff like this in the past.
Messofanego
Banned
Why would you regret being financially secure and mentally mature before you get married? Younger people who get married before those things regret a lot more. Don't compare yourself to others, like others have said, it's not a race. You're not trying to show off. You're hopefully going to be with this one person for your entire life, you can never be too late. This is your life, not others, focus on you.
lunchtoast
Member
Had a great time with the girl from last night. Talked until the bar closed. She was for spending more time together but got a text from the family she's staying with about wanted to turn the alarm system on so she wanted to hang out again on Friday.
I told her I will make her dinner and we could watch a movie. She's also pretty active with texting me and replying so let's see where this goes on Friday.
Also got her into Girl Talk!
I told her I will make her dinner and we could watch a movie. She's also pretty active with texting me and replying so let's see where this goes on Friday.
Also got her into Girl Talk!
WarrenMax007
Member
So guys, i kind of need some advice,
Yesterday i went to a gig. My friends weren't able to go, so i found some people to go with on an event page on social media. Also people who were going alone. We met up and went to a gig. There were also other people from this group who were there since the morning, and we weren't able to get through the crowd to get to them. So we decided to go by ourselfs. Me and 3 girls. We lost one when we were going through security and stuff. When we got to the floor one of them wanted to go to the rail and the other (the one i liked, let's call her Kate) didn't want to stand in the front of the stage, because as you know it gets kind of hardcore in there. She basically says that and looks at me like "come with me?". I wasn't really feeling being in the front, so we went. Which i thought is a little weird, that she will abandon a girl that she was having a nice time chatting with, to go stand with some guy she just met, even if she feels uncomfortable being in the slam and stuff. Because if i were her, i obviously wouldn't do it.
Sorry for the long prologue, but basically fun was had, some other people joined us, then after the show we met up with the girl that went to the rail, and began waiting to get out of the venue. When we were putting our jackets on, Kate said "your hood" and went ahead and fixed my hood, which i guess was twisted or something. i also thought that weird. But i still not sure was it a sign that she might like me or just that she's super nice.
And here i get to my question. I really liked her, so i'm thinking of asking her out tomorrow, to go to the movie on the weekend. How should i go about it? Should i call her? Text? Facebook? Maybe i should wait a week? But personally i don't think that's such a good idea. What do you say, GAF?
Yesterday i went to a gig. My friends weren't able to go, so i found some people to go with on an event page on social media. Also people who were going alone. We met up and went to a gig. There were also other people from this group who were there since the morning, and we weren't able to get through the crowd to get to them. So we decided to go by ourselfs. Me and 3 girls. We lost one when we were going through security and stuff. When we got to the floor one of them wanted to go to the rail and the other (the one i liked, let's call her Kate) didn't want to stand in the front of the stage, because as you know it gets kind of hardcore in there. She basically says that and looks at me like "come with me?". I wasn't really feeling being in the front, so we went. Which i thought is a little weird, that she will abandon a girl that she was having a nice time chatting with, to go stand with some guy she just met, even if she feels uncomfortable being in the slam and stuff. Because if i were her, i obviously wouldn't do it.
Sorry for the long prologue, but basically fun was had, some other people joined us, then after the show we met up with the girl that went to the rail, and began waiting to get out of the venue. When we were putting our jackets on, Kate said "your hood" and went ahead and fixed my hood, which i guess was twisted or something. i also thought that weird. But i still not sure was it a sign that she might like me or just that she's super nice.
And here i get to my question. I really liked her, so i'm thinking of asking her out tomorrow, to go to the movie on the weekend. How should i go about it? Should i call her? Text? Facebook? Maybe i should wait a week? But personally i don't think that's such a good idea. What do you say, GAF?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Very long prologue for a question that can be resolved very simply: ask her out. If she says yes, she likes you. Don't do a movie. Movies are terrible first dates.
Why wait? You'll never see her again if she says no, so you've nothing to worry about.
Text her. And when you do ask her out, make sure you actually ask her out. In other words, ask her out for drinks, not to hang out.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
People change careers and living arrangements all the time. This isn't the past, when people worked one job for 40 years, married the girl next door, and had multiple kids.
Enjoy your freedom. Some can't move or quit their job because of family/spouse/children.
Plus, older men do have it easier than older women due to societal and biological reasons. So don't feel like you're "too late".
names2hard4you
Member
Dead.
Yeah man just ask her out pls. And don't overthink for the love of everything that's holy. You are diving into dangerous territory when you start analyzing every single action a girl does to you (or your hood in this case lol).
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