Messofanego
Banned
That's weird. Usually you get the number first, and then agree on a date. Of course you should expect their number if they have already agreed on a date.
Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
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That's weird. Usually you get the number first, and then agree on a date. Of course you should expect their number if they have already agreed on a date.
Fuck "bad luck". That's just removing agency from the situation and placing blame on something nonexistent.
People use Tinder more for dates than hookups nowadays, though I won't comment on it's reputation in your slice of the world. It is prone to flakes and ghosts. The easier a dating site is to sign up for, the higher the odds you'll meet people not serious about meeting up. If you can't get any dates out of any dating apps, the apps aren't the problem.
I've gone on dates without getting the number before, but OKC has a more stable app. Whether texting or app, I had a constant direct line to their phone. If you're asking for their number and they ghost, they weren't that interested.
Lucian Cat
Kissed a mod for a tag; liked it
Miles Quaritch
Member
I met me fiancée on tinder. Lots of people were starting to use tinder to find dates when I was last on there and I can only assume that's gone up. Users getting older, starting to want something more serious, etc.
But there are a lot of flakes on tinder, just as there will be on any free dating websites. You just have to roll with it. If you want to get more serious, consider using a paid for site to find someone? Match is supposed to be well regarded.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Well, this resolved itself. Just finished date #4 with Aya last night and we're exclusive now. I asked ("I'm not seeing anyone else right now and I don't want to").
It's to the point where it's nauseatingly cute ("I love waking up next to you"). I know, I know. Lawyer girl was supposed to be in town this weekend and I told her to let me know what she was up to, but thankfully winter intervened and it's frosty as shit outside.
This thread really is great for killing FOMO, though. But it feels so weird to be in something comfortable and promising. Usually I'm leading the shitshow from the front, not watching from the sidelines.
The date went well, although I got called sweet in a text she sent after? My instincts tell me that's not a good sign, but maybe I'm just overthinking it as usual. What she sent to me is viewable by quoting this post.
It's also worth noting that she's going back to the States for Christmas, hence how she ended it.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Think about the date, not the text. Anyway, there's nothing wrong with being called sweet. Just play it cool, make sure you find stuff to do over the holidays (what are your plans, anyway?), and send her a cute .gif of a puppy in a Santa hat or something on Christmas Eve and ping her when she's about to get back to set something up for a follow-on date.
BLOODED_hands
Member
So being a short guy, she just asked me for my height >_> I'm kind of dreading telling her that I'm 5'3" 
There's nothing else but to tell her truthfully, right?
There's nothing else but to tell her truthfully, right?
dreamcastmaster
Banned
So being a short guy, she just asked me for my height >_> I'm kind of dreading telling her that I'm 5'3"
There's nothing else but to tell her truthfully, right?
Add a coupe of inches, not like she's going to get out a ruler to check. But basically, you got to roll with it. Or quote Yoda.
Count Dookkake
Member
So being a short guy, she just asked me for my height >_> I'm kind of dreading telling her that I'm 5'3"
There's nothing else but to tell her truthfully, right?
Tell her, then ask her how much she weighs.
BLOODED_hands
Member
Lol, I'm not that savage. All I'll say about her is that she's thick/curvy and that's something I like.
Hm.... I'll add one or two inches just to be on the "safe" side. I'll attempt to roll with it, also.
Thanks y'all.
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
Lol, considering women are shorter I wouldn't lie unless he knows how tall she is. If he says 5'6" and then she's 5'4" then it's going to be awkward.
Quick question: got in a fight over my ex sleeping with my best friend behind my back. Been going on for months and they both lied to me multiple times about it and both contend they did nothing wrong. Keep in mind this is after I told both of them I was uncomfortable with them being together and told them both I still had feelings for my ex I was working through. I'm in the process of cutting both from my life.
Overreaction or neccesary?
Overreaction or neccesary?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Your ex did wrong, but not much: she (seemingly) cut all ties from you. The lying's suspect, of course. However, your best friend isn't a friend at all, so cut all ties from him.
Move on; you deserve better people in your life.
Use this to ensure you get over your feelings for your ex, though.
Sounds about were I landed. I'm moving to a new state to be with family and start over, blocked the friend in every capacity I could think of and told my ex to call me if she's ever in trouble but that until I've completely moved on to not talk to me or expect me to contact her. I had originally planned to block her too but fuck, I know my exfriend is going to hurt her and I'm still not ready to never talk to her again. Maybe in a few years we can still be friends....is that dangerous to think that way? The friend is done though, no hard feelings for dropping that selfish piece of shit like a bad habit. If I ever run into him in a dark alley he's getting the shit beat out of him. First words out of his mouth when I confronted him: "I didn't know I was supposed to tell you." This coming from a guy who had his girl cheat on him with his best friend. What a fucking fool.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
It's dangerous to think that way, yes. And nothing's really worth attacking your ex-friend either: you and your ex weren't together, and no one cheated on anyone. That said, he proved himself to be an absolutely shitty friend and not worth your time, just like your ex did. There's no point in pursuing friendship with her, because we all know what pursuing friendship with exes is code for.
You're moving to a new state, so just cut these people from your life. You can do better.
As if he believes that. If he believed he was doing nothing wrong, he wouldn't have lied repeatedly about it.
Hah! You asshole, you're reading me like a book. I won't lie, I've already thought about coming back after a time when she's bored with my friend and proving to her I'm better than he could ever hope to be.
Lawd. Why couldn't she have fucked anyone else....literally. ANYONE ELSE. Fuck em. You're right. Besides she's just dumb and crazy enough to stay with him regardless. Wanna know how I caught them? I found a handwritten note where she bitched him out for sleeping with other girls and that she was moving away and that she never wanted to talk to him again. Last I saw them they were in the same bed "platonically" sleeping together. Fucking nuts man.
ZackieChan
Member
Dude, you need to move on from both of them.
BLOODED_hands
Member
For those interested, she's a few inches shorter than me (like my ex). She's five feet tall and I'm 5'3". She at least admits that I'm taller than her! Yay. Now..... How should I ask her out and where can I take her? (talking to myself).
So much this.
Thanks, I'll just keep things light.
She'll unfortunately be busy for most of January though (lots of visits), so chances are I doubt we'd be able to meet much (if at all) for most of that time.
Nothing whatsoever, I'm just overthinking again and jumping to the conclusion of it being similar to being called a "nice guy".
Miles Quaritch
Member
I have to ask, why cut your best friend out of your life?
I can see your point of view of being angry that they were having sex, but you were broken up and while you're free to still have feelings for your ex, you don't have any right to tell them who they can sleep and if you feel comfortable or not with them having sex with someone.
I think you need to get over your feelings, grow up a little bit and stop overreacting. Cutting your best friend out of your life is an unnecessary overreaction.
Miles Quaritch
Member
He lied because he knew the poster was still upset and had feelings for her. It doesn't seem malicious in its intent, more like a comforting lie to not hurt the poster any more.
The issue is with the poster and their inability to move on. He's now lashing out and very likely has feelings of betrayal when he has no right to do so.
It depends on how long the ex has been the ex, and how they broke up. There's a point where it'll hurt your friend if you hook up with their ex.
Poster does need to move on though. All that "I want to go back with her and prove I'm better than he could ever hope to be" is all kinds of fucked up.
Miles Quaritch
Member
I've always seen the time excuse as a bit of a cop out. For all we know she checked out of the relationship long before things actually came to an end, so the time from break up to new relationship for her is different to the poster. I feel that's something that always gets lost in cases where one person moved on just a few days/weeks later.
As for the other posts. Yeah, I honestly can't be bothered to go over those. I'm having a chill Sunday. All I'll say is...the comments about beating up the 'best friend', calling his ex dumb and crazy (so this wasn't an issue while they were dating?) and coming back to prove to a dumb and crazy ex how good his is compared to his 'best friend?'
Pathetic and highlights how he's going to have major issues getting over this break up, primarily because he's blaming everyone but himself.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
I usually agree with you, and I don't necessarily disagree with you. But the poster's moving across the country, and to be honest, those friendships were going to decline anyway. I still think the best friend was shitty about things due to duplicity (but we're only getting one side of the story, of course), but my gut reaction is for him to focus on building new friendships wherever he's moving rather than linger in the past.
If this is something he and his buddy can laugh about five years from now ("Dude, remember when we were both hung up on Nicki? God, we were fucking idiots"), all the better.
ZackieChan
Member
Had a nice date tonight with the gf and her sister. I'm domesticated as fuck now.
Smh
What happened?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
I turned down an 11pm "What are you doing tonight?" text from hot lawyer. Good thing we had that exclusivity talk. Aya accidentally left her necklace at my place. I'm actively missing her.
So, what's her GAF username?
Miles Quaritch
Member
I'd always place a best friend relationship above a romantic one, but it seems they either weren't best friends or he's just lashing out.
Either way, I believe friendships are harder to come by than relationships. Maybe not what some want to hear, but relationships come and go over the tiniest of misunderstandings, but a good, solid friendship with someone you consider a best friend..that's much harder to find.
As you said though, new city, new opportunities.
It's me. Her GAF username Jhoana with an A in the end but she hasn't made an account yet.
Million dollar question: In a world where regular posters are taking themselves off the market, might this be The One for Lulubop? Find out next time on Days of Our Lulubopping Lives..
Miles Quaritch
Member
Time for Ray Wonder to step up.
Knock out a song to celebrate your new status fam...
Knock out a song to celebrate your new status fam...
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Time for gaiages to make a new Relationship Age |OT| Careful What You Wish For, so we can all hang out there.
Ray Wonder got this. Jason too, if his nipples stopped burning.
LucidMomentum
Member
I volunteer as tribute.
Oh wait, you said hot.
Unless dad bods who can lift weights count.
Still though, happy to see you all getting cuffed for the holidays.
Still trying to get past the first date but things are chill with that one girl who wasn't looking to date just yet so I've been kind of lazy in terms of searching for a deeper relationship.
I'm content for the most part but would like some more physicality.
voodoowoolf
Neo Member
Think I'm going to jump back on tinder, I met a beautiful woman but think she going to get back with her ex. Tinder is so dope for my generation, bad breakup? Tinder! want some company? Tinder! It's really shallow but sometimes a dog just needs some ass. hahaha
My Reggie Watts mane brings all the girls to the yard and they're like it's better than yours. I like romantic walks along the piers of Manhattan, draw people in the subway, disarm people with my command of the Spanish language, and melt people's hearts with my good penmanship. Oh wait, except that I'm on the Online-Dating side of the coin since I lurk in this thread a ton so I guess that disqualifies me from running.
I think you're being too hard on yourself man. I've been on so many dates this year that ended up leading nowhere or seemed promising but I wasn't too interested. Looking back, I have a couple of regrets but then I've also realized that I'm more experienced than I was a year ago. I'm sill dating despite the hardships, the cynicism that's been instilled in me, the countless conversations about work, passions, and background; despite the fact that it might feel like a chore for me at times. But in the end of the day, I'm putting myself out there which is way more than any self-pitying guy who hasn't been on a single date can say.
In order to grow and change, we need to learn from our failures/past experiences. Nobody is ever going to be perfect and no relationship is ever 100% perfect but you can apply your past experiences to future ones. I understand that you're burned out by dating since I go through that at times but in the end day, you're still human and want the same basic things that everyone else wants. Besides, any girl who doesn't at least respect a guy who does cosplay, isn't worth your time.
Hey, guys. Guess I'll be joining you for a minute now. Broke up with my college girlfriend of 4 years about a week ago now and I'm pretty much already itching to get back on the horse. Not gonna set up an OkCupid profile, don't want something serious right now but I would like to get somebody to hang with.
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